Dear Abby from 12-31-07

[Illinois59]

Dear Abby has a letter from the next door neighbor of a family who has a 16 year old son who is definitely into naturism/nudism. It seems the neighbor was not bothered by the boy's nudity when he was younger but now that he is becoming an adult, the neighbor is having a problem with it while the boy's family (parents and sister) apparently fully accept the boy's nudity without objection. The letter also indicates that the neighbor is a bit of a Peeping Tom and gives no indication of any objectionable behavior on the part of the 16 year old. The Dear Abby response amounted to "don't look in your neighbor's windows and call before you drop in" and that different families have different levels of acceptance of nudity by family members. This was one of the few Dear Abby responses about nudity that really made sense.

[jon71]

I agree. It crazy how far some people will go in order to get offended. If you don't want to see then put put down the binoculars, lol.

[Josh-here]

Yeah, that sounds like this one lady once who registered a complaint that her neighbors were naked in their yard and she could see them if she stood on her step-stool with her binoculars and she was offended!

[Jason Lee]

Dear Abby 31-12-07 http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20071231

I have lived next door to the "Smiths" for 18 years. They're nice people. When problems have arisen they have helped me out and I have done the same for them. We're good neighbors and friends.

I have known the Smiths children their whole lives. Their daughter is now 17. Their son was born a year later.

Is it normal for a 16-year-old boy to walk around the house naked in plain view of family members? No one seems to notice or care. There are no looks or comments.

In the morning he gets up around 6:45. He walks into the kitchen and fixes a bowl of cereal. Then he stands at the counter watching the morning sports shows while eating his breakfast in the nude. There is absolutely no evidence of arousal of any kind. When the bathroom becomes available he goes in for a shower.

I have never seen any of the other family members naked. This boy has no compunctions about being seen by his father mother sister or next-door neighbor. He's been nude in my presence dozens of times. I know it's common for little boys to run around without clothes on sometimes but Abby he's not a little boy anymore.

[Nude in the North]

It's good to get a little common sense support from Abby.
Now if we could get all the nosy neighbors in the world to just mind their own business...

[kdsisa]

Wow. I have to say I'm surprised. Sometimes it seems that all we hear about casual nudity is that it's evil, and now a "big name" comes up with a moderate and reasonable response to a question on the subject. Cool.

[luvnaturism]

Actually Abby has been pretty consistent in her approach to nudity. She doesn't have a problem with it if it's kept in the family or in other appropriate places, such as designated nudist places. She's against nudity that is imposed on others by virtue of someone being nude in a place visible to the general public. If someone is bothered by nudity being practiced where there is reasonable expectation of privacy, then that someone should quit looking.

That's a pretty balanced and common-sense approach. I don't think she's been 100% consistent with it, but her overall track record is good.

[Stu2630]

luvnaturism

She doesn't have a problem with it if it's kept in the family or in other appropriate places, such as designated nudist places.

Same here!

She's against nudity that is imposed on others by virtue of someone being nude in a place visible to the general public.

Same here! Wow! That's exactly my position.

That's a pretty balanced and common-sense approach. I don't think she's been 100% consistent with it, but her overall track record is good.

So how come when "Abby" says this stuff, it's balanced and common-sense, but when I say exactly the same thing, I'm being anti-nudist?

Stu

[MoonShadow]

Because, Stu, you are. Abby is taking the middle road here to appease all parties (as she now does often in her column; her column in years past, she was Miz Prim and Proper. She was a prude also. Seems the years have mellowed out her column or the writers are more open-minded).

[nakedIOWAman]

Because you, stu, are being the peeping tom, nosy neighbor. The nudists hanging around this website are not visible unless you are here. If the nudity you see bothers you so damn much, all you got to do is mind your own business and stop coming around. The real nudists of this site don't come walking down your street or to your door showing themselves asking you to join in. The only nude people you have ever seen, are the ones you go looking for and probably in a legal spot. If you ever get a life, and do something else, you'll never know we exist. Sadly, the world is full of people that cant mind there own business! Do you really think we will just go away because you say the same thing over and over and over?

[luvnaturism]

So how come when "Abby" says this stuff, it's balanced and common-sense, but when I say exactly the same thing, I'm being anti-nudist?

Stu

Stu, I've never objected to your views on the particular points that i cited in my post above. You and I are pretty much in agreement on these specific topics. There are other matters on which we disagree, but not on these.

[luvnaturism]

Because, Stu, you are. Abby is taking the middle road here to appease all parties (as she now does often in her column; her column in years past, she was Miz Prim and Proper. She was a prude also. Seems the years have mellowed out her column or the writers are more open-minded).

Perhaps you're confusing two different people. The Dear Abby of years ago was indeed pretty prudish about all things nude. However, the column has been written for several years now by Abigail Van Buren's daughter, who is much more tolerant and common-sense about the human body.

[sunfisher]

Remember that if you look through your neighbor's window and became offended by what you see that it is your neighbor that you have offended. It was you that forced yourself to see what he was doing, not the other way around.

[Stu2630]

Stu, I've never objected to your views on the particular points that i cited in my post above. You and I are pretty much in agreement on these specific topics. There are other matters on which we disagree, but not on these.

Luvnaturism

You are a naturist who takes the trouble to read and understand what I actually say, and not simply make assumptions on the basis that I'm some sort of anti-nudist (which I am absolutely not!). I know there are things we won't agree on, but the points I mentioned which Abby says are really the main thrust of my views.

Stu

[Naturist4Ever]

Remember that if you look through your neighbor's window and became offended by what you see that it is your neighbor that you have offended. It was you that forced yourself to see what he was doing, not the other way around.

This is a complicated subject that belongs in the legal forum. Several posts have been made in the past for people "arrested" (not sure if also convicted) for "exposing" themselves to the public from their private properties. Laws vary considerably from country to country, so this can't be generalised.

Under current law your statement does not apply to nudity, and certainly not if the nude person is visible from a public space.


_________________________
** Stu is on my ignore list **

[luvnaturism]

Luvnaturism

You are a naturist who takes the trouble to read and understand what I actually say, and not simply make assumptions on the basis that I'm some sort of anti-nudist (which I am absolutely not!). I know there are things we won't agree on, but the points I mentioned which Abby says are really the main thrust of my views.

Stu

Actually, Stu, it's nothing personal but I rarely read what you post and almost never respond. Generally you are making the same points over and over, and often at great length. It's just not a debate that I care to enter into. Nevertheless, it's true that you and I agree on several points related to the public practice of naturism.

Back when there was a movement to ban you from this forum, I wrote in your defense. Obviously there are people who enjoy the continuing exchange, even if they pretend to be annoyed, so that's OK with me. Your posts are always courteous and well-reasoned, which is more than can be said for some others who frequent this forum, or have done so in the past.

I have no doubt that we'd enjoy knowing each other if that were possible. We're to be in England next May, but it will be on a tour so not much free time and zero control of our itinerary.

Best wishes to you for 2008.