Reluctant Wife

[Ossian]

I came to realise that I enjoy nudism after I was married. I got my wife to come with me to a local clothing optional beach but she never took her clothes off. Now I can,t even get her to come with me. So now I am torn between wanting to spend time nude on the beach or to spend time with my wife. With limited free time this becomes somewhat of a problem. I was able to get permision from my kids to be nude around the house which helps but I would like my wife to join me. She does sleep nude and I have ask her to take small steps to become more comfortable without clothing such as stay undressed after taking a shower, coming down to coffee before getting dressed etc. No luck. She says she does not want to upset the kids 17 and 20 years old even though they told her they do not have a problem with us being nude. I will keep being patient and possibly try finding a private vacation house with a pool. Maybe with just the two of us she will at least give that a go

[HabaneroSting]

Ossian,

I know exactly what you mean. My former spouse had no problem being nude around the house or in front of the kids, but had no interest in being socially nude at a beach or elsewhere. Now that I am divorced, my current significant other knows about my Naturism, but is reluctant to participate. The advantage that both of us have is that our other-half's know and accept our nakedness. It may take some time, but I think with invitations to participate (not pressure) they will eventually warm up to the idea. Most of the time, reluctance to be nude, even in private, is a self-esteem issue. They are uncomfortable being nude because they don't feel good about themselves. It sounds like the "nude around the kids" reason is covering up a general insecurity. You know your wife, but I'm sure that when she does take the leap into nudism she will feel an over whelming relief and sense of personal freedom.

[NudeAl]

This is a familiar problem here and with a little research you may find many other pages of suggesions on this matter. I myself have had this same problem. I tried for years to get this thing sorted out. I have a compromise situation in that she is fully nude at home most of the time and that includes the private backyard . However, and here is the kicker, though we were members of another nudist resort in the past she is extremely reluctant to go now. I am trying to get this problem solved and I have had some small success but it is a long hard road. I would suggest going to the AANR website and looking around they have some helpful literature on the subject. Perhaps a club is more private there is an AANR club just west of Portland very nice place and another down near Eugene. I find I enjoy Sauvies Islands' Collins Beach and at that beach there is no requirement to disrobe your spouse can wear as much as she wants to and you can be nude. Goodluck

[Ossian]

Thanks for your responses and suggestions. I have read many post on this subject and am working patiently to boost my wifes comfort level. I am happy she has excepted my desire to be nude and even says she does not have a problem we me spending time with other nudist. But I get precious time enjoying her company I am always torn between social nudism and being with her.

[NudeAl]

One area that worked in the past was a clothing optional resort. She enjoyed going there as long as we had accomodations, she's not a camper! LOL! The only place's that were required to be nude were the pool/hot tub areas. But I would estimate that around 90% were nude or semi nude (top or bottomless) We were also members of a non landed naturist group we woul get together once a month for potluck dinners and plan beach outings etc. We went to far more potlucks than anything else though. I have heard of special womens groups where only women are allowed. These are organized by local area clubs and vary from place to place but they are designed to be a female friendly environment sort of the same principal as those workout facilities that only allow women so they are not selfconscious about their bodies. They seem to be a bit hard to find but if they exist in your area this would be another great tool to inform her about nudism/naturism.

[sunfisher]

There is a very nice small resort (www.willamettans.com) not too far from the Portland area that you may want to check out. My wife & I spent 3 days and nights there last summer. We met quite a few very nice people ranging in age from 2yrs to 82yrs. They all treated us like family and made us feel very welcome and so relaxed that my wife who is normally a bit shy ventured up on stage for the first time for kareokee night. Much to her suprise she became the star of the night. Several people asked her to sing their favorite or join them on stage for a duet. We had a really great time and hope to return for another visit sometime soon, but at 500+ miles away its a bit of a stretch for the time being.

Gene

[NudeAl]

I've stayed at the Willies twice and it was a place my wife really liked. They are a very friendly bunch and they have lovely grounds with lots of big old trees. Very quite place on a weekday.

[Cheri]

I concur about the Willies. It's a great place to go, but it's not that small. The park is very spread out. Be prepared to do a lot of walking if you want to walk all around it.

Are the deer still there nibbling on the trees? They are fascinating to watch in others' gardens. :)

[Ossian]

Thanks for the info on Willamettans. I check their web page and I see they have a few visitor days. This might be low key enough for my wife. I see what she says.

[MICHIEL]

I think the biggest hurdle is that a lot of woman have issues about their bodies. They have to be reassured that you love them just the way they are. in the real world a perfect body only exists between the pages of publications. Reassurance I have found is the only way my wife gets enough courage to go nude. If she'll ever go nude in front of others I don't know but around me it happens more often and with less issues. Be curteous and praise her, for the courage she has, to be naked. It works !!

MICHIEL

[GORDON2BARE]

this is usually a common occurance. I introduced my wife before we got married to go nude as she had a swimming pool for awhile than went to visit one of the local nudist resorts later on, also her daughter denies it, but she enjoys be nude at times and acdepts both myself and her mother being nude at home or at local resort/friends homes

[SouthernJR]

I have found that if your partner is allowed to progress at their own pace. Most of the time it will work out for all. The person has to feel comfortable with themselves first.