sorry its so long should be a joke but just like real life

[stevenf64]

Recently, I was diagnosed with AAADD:

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decided to wash my car.

As I start toward the garage,

I spotted the mail on the hall table.

I should go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay the car keys on the table,

put the junk mail in the trash can under the table,

and notice that the trash can is full.

So, I put the bills back on the table and take out the trash first.

Since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway,

I might as well pay the bills first.

I see my checkbook on the table,

but there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,

so I go to my desk,

where I find the bottle of juice that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks,

but first I need to push the juice aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

But the juice is getting warm,

and should be put in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

Heading toward the kitchen with the juice,

a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye.

They need to be watered.

I set the juice down on the counter,

and find my reading glasses,

for which I've been searching all morning.

I had better put them back on my desk,

but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter,

fill a container with water,

and suddenly spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

Tonight when we sit down to watch TV,

we will be looking for the remote,

but nobody will remember that it's on the kitchen table.

I should put it back in the den where it belongs,

but first I'll water the flowers.

I splash some water on the flowers,

but most of it spills on the floor.

So, I put the remote back down on the table,

and get some towels to wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: the car isn't washed,

the bills aren't paid, there is a warm bottle of juice sitting on the counter,

the flowers aren't watered,

there is still only one check in my checkbook,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

I'm trying to figure out why nothing got done today;

it's quite baffling because I know I was busy all day long,

and I'm really tired.

I know this is a serious problem,

and I'll try to get some help for it,

but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you?

Forward this message to whoever you think might enjoy it,

because I don't remember who I've already sent it to.

[stevenf64]

Recently, I was diagnosed with AAADD:

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decided to wash my car.

As I start toward the garage,

I spotted the mail on the hall table.

I should go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay the car keys on the table,

put the junk mail in the trash can under the table,

and notice that the trash can is full.

So, I put the bills back on the table and take out the trash first.

Since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway,

I might as well pay the bills first.

I see my checkbook on the table,

but there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,

so I go to my desk,

where I find the bottle of juice that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks,

but first I need to push the juice aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

But the juice is getting warm,

and should be put in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

Heading toward the kitchen with the juice,

a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye.

They need to be watered.

I set the juice down on the counter,

and find my reading glasses,

for which I've been searching all morning.

I had better put them back on my desk,

but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter,

fill a container with water,

and suddenly spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

Tonight when we sit down to watch TV,

we will be looking for the remote,

but nobody will remember that it's on the kitchen table.

I should put it back in the den where it belongs,

but first I'll water the flowers.

I splash some water on the flowers,

but most of it spills on the floor.

So, I put the remote back down on the table,

and get some towels to wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: the car isn't washed,

the bills aren't paid, there is a warm bottle of juice sitting on the counter,

the flowers aren't watered,

there is still only one check in my checkbook,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

I'm trying to figure out why nothing got done today;

it's quite baffling because I know I was busy all day long,

and I'm really tired.

I know this is a serious problem,

and I'll try to get some help for it,

but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you?

Forward this message to whoever you think might enjoy it,

because I don't remember who I've already sent it to.

Well, Steven, that sounds a lot like me. I enjoyed it very much. I can't imagine how many things I've lost in this house and can't find. I keep buying the same thing over and over because I can't find the one I bought and can't remember buying it. Then I find all of them. I put my glasses on top of my head and wonder where they are. I carry my car keys in my hand and then can't find them. I have to put everything in a specific place every time, or I won't know where it is and will hunt frantically for it. And just think--I'm not even a "senior citizen" yet! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[fred950]

Same here, Jon-Mark. But to me the realy wierd part is if someone asks about some obscure event that happened twenty years ago or what my parents telephone number was forty years ago...No problem.

[shãybare]

I would like to respond but I forgot what I was going to say.

Forever Nude,
Shaybare

[Suntied]

I was going to respond, but I can't find my fingers... so I typed with my nose. You will all find ways to overcome these... what was I saying?

[gamblefish]

I was gonna respond but...oh, hell I can't top "can't find my fingers".....blast you Suntied!

I am learning to focus now more on what I am trying to do so that I do not go off-track and forget what I was doing and wind up in the parking lot of WalMart wondering what I am doing there and where is my car and why am I naked and..........oh boy...

I've often gotten into my car and started to pull out of the driveway only to stop and ask myself, "Where am I going?" I often start to write down something on my grocery list only to forget what it was. I walk from the kitchen to the bedroom to get something and can't remember what it was. I've called people and left a message on their answering machine to call me back. When they did I forgot why I called them. /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

Gee ...I'm glad to know I'm not the only one thats......?????...hmmmm /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[missouriboy]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by gamblefish:
...wind up in the parking lot of WalMart wondering what I am doing there and where is my car and why am I naked and..........oh boy... <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Weren't you supposed to reveal this in the "Naked Dreams" thread? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[gamblefish]

Awww shoot!! There I go again...

Thanks missouriboy, it must be the AAADD again.

Where's hw when I need her. Just like a woman, off shopping somewhere or somthin'.

HW!!!!!!!! CAN YOU HEAR ME? I NEED THE OTHER HALF OF THAT BRAIN OF OURS...THE VOICES ARE FADING, OH, THEY ARE FADING away..... HW, I'M OFF TOPIC AGAIN!!!

Oh, wait, I'm the one that is supposed to be off topic, ain't I? Oh, missouriboy, I am sooo confused...can you help me? Pleeeeeeeeeeeze??

[missouriboy]

In my naked dream I was almost certain I saw her in that WalMart parking lot. You're right, she was shopping again...

[CalgaryMark]

"I walk from the kitchen to the bedroom to get something and can't remember what it was."

Jon-Marc, that's called 'worrying about the hereafter . . .' /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[nudeM]

Is AAADD something like taking the weekend off from doing the usual weekend chores and at the end of the weekend, you find out that nothing really was accomplished? No problem, it'll get done next weekend, which usually ends up being next year. So what's the problem?

[tarsus]

true story
some years ago i got into my car, no keys, looked for hours before finding in car door i had unlocked. its only gotten worse as i age.sometimes i go on trips and forget where i was going, some times i start talking and forget------------------------ /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

I sometimes wonder--as bad as my memory is getting, will I remember who I am by the time I'm 70? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[hw]

Sorry little fishy, I was gone for the weekend, and what a weekend it was! /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif The voice of reason is back, but I'm think I left my brain somewhere on a beach in .....where was I? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[stevenf64]

jon marc who? anyways I tow on weekend sometimes for a friend of mine some of the things people call on. I older lady couldnt get her car to start but she couldnt get the keys out of it either. took me 10 secs. car was in drive. /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[hw]

stevenf64.....sounds of memory loss.....it happens. Take heart Jon-Marc.....even younger people have been known to forget things. During pregnancy women often forget their train of thought. I'm not sure if it's the swelling of the ankles, or raging of the hormones. /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif I tend to make lists so I don't forget, just can't remember where I put the list! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Gamblefish....told you I was going away for the weekend....what happened? Did you forget? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Speaking of a list--I have to write everything down or I will forget. The problem is, I forget to look at the note! I collect coupons and always forget to use them. Every few months I go through the coupons and throw out the expired ones when I happen to think about it. /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[gamblefish]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by hw:
Gamblefish....told you I was going away for the weekend....what happened? Did you forget? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Welcome back hw!!!!!!!!!!((((((((hw)))))))))

No, I didn't ferget you was goin' to Morrowwwwwwwwwww Bay for the weekend, just didn't think you was gonna need your half of the brain and I hoped you woulda left it wit me...the voices were beginning to fade..........

Glad you had a good time, you too nudeM. We all missed you both.

Now, where did my point go? /infopop/emoticons/icon_razz.gif

[hw]

Gamblefish...did you lose your point again? /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif How many times have I told you to put it away so you wouldn't forget it? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif Try using lists like Jon-Marc...at least if you make a list you tried....now where was I headed with this? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[fred950]

Gamble, if you need a piont, I can give you one off the top of my head.

[shãybare]

gamble fish, if you need a point, you can depend on me, also. I am pointing it at you now. /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Forever Nude,
Shaybare /infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif

[nudeM]

Has anyone ever read the last chapter of a book, before reading the entire book, just to see what happened before the conclusion?

Has anyone made a shopping list and after returning home, suddenly realize that there were things you forgot to buy, that was on the list?

Has anyone put $20.00 worth of gas in their car and realized that you don't have $20.00, and the store doesn't take credit cards or ATM?

Has anyone showed their ID when attempting to make an alcohol or tobacco purchase suddenly realize that the address is actually 10 to 15 years outdated? You actually moved.

Has anyone ever went "to the snow" and after arriving, realize that you forgot your jacket, and the short sleeve shirt would not suffice.

Has anyone purchase a piece of furniture and assembled it and suddenly realize that the instructions actually had steps 1, 2, 3, etc...

Has anyone purchased an electronic item and tried to program it, just to realize you have to send off for the frequencies available in your area?

Has anyone given a cordless phone as a gift because it was on sale, and suddenly realized you MUST purchase the expensive base unit for it to work. (Can you say "return")?

Have you ever gone to a nudist beach and suddenly realize that everyone looks just like you, to one extent or another? (Just threw that one in) /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

NudeM ....Three of the things on your list happened to me....The shopping list... the incomplete gift(A ravioli maker for my sister)...And the 20 dollar gas fillup which was the most embarrasing...Unfortunately or fortunately? I cant remember the circumstances....???? /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Yes, some of those have happened to me--including getting gas and not being able to pay for it. Where I shop, Meijer, we have a store card to pay for our groceries electronically and drawing out cash from our checking account at the store. One day I asked for $10 cash to buy gas. She forgot to give it to me, although I was charged for it along with my groceries, and I didn't even notice. I put $10 worth of gas in my car and then didn't have the money to pay for it. Talk about being embarrassed! I had to give the man all kinds of ID and then go back to the store and convince them that I hadn't gotten the money that I drew out. They wanted ID in case I was trying to get the money illegally, and their account didn't balance at the end of the day. Then I had to go back and pay for the gas. /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

[florida-david]

without know it, i left my wallet under the hood once when i was in college. i drove an hour out of town, pumped a full tank of gas, and than looked for my wallet unable to find it. i pleaded with the gas man to let me drive back to school to look for my wallet. after leaving him all my cassette tapes as collateral, i drove back an hour and looked around for it. i even drove to where i stopped for lunch and looked everywhere. than i remembered i checked my oil at the restaraunt before leaving town, popped the hood, and there it was crammed between the top of the mcpherson strut tower and the hood. luckily it was wedged pretty good or i would have lost it. i than drove another hour and retrieved my tapes. and i was around 20y/o, and i'm still forgetting everything.

now where did i leave that car this time?!?!? oh yeah, its in the garage, i think

Two different times after putting a quart of oil in my care, I forgot to put the oil cap back on and lost it. Do you have any idea what a mess oil makes when it shoots out all over the engine and inside of the engine lid? /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[hw]

florida-david......sounds like you had a senior moment in your 20's.....way to go! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif (No offence to seniors here.) I guess that must have quite a sight, you back tracking everywhere. lol Anyway, have a nice evening. /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

[hw]

Old is When:

Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love", and you answer, "Honey, I can't do both!"

Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot. /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

A sexy babe catches you fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door! /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

Going bra-less pulls the wrinkles out of your face.

You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

When you are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of the police.

"Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today. /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

"Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.

An "all nighter" means not getting up to pee! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[missouriboy]

An "all nighter" means not getting up to pee! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Hmmmmmmmm....... what's it mean when you should have and didn't?

Second childhood? /infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif

[hw]

Missouriboy, if you should have got up but didn't hopefully it was just a "leak" in the waterbed! /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif