Telling someone I know about nudism

[J-Kwon]

How do I do it?

[J-Kwon]

How do I do it?

[Rik]

First of all decide what it is you want to tell them about nudism.

Rik

[ShYgUy729]

Jonathan,

You could try telling a very close friend, that's what I did, and it worked out great!

[NKDDON]

Jonathan I think the first question to ask yourself is "why should I tell them?" What is their need to know? What difference does it mean to you whether or not people know you are a nudist? If THEY ask, tell them you are, otherwise why even bring it up? Whats there to gain? Its a bit like a gay guy in the closet. Once you tell all you are gay you have to accept the consequences of the answers. Some will be in support, others will no longer speak to you.
Be patient, tell only those who you think might want to know more about naturism and perhaps join with you in its benefits. You must just be patient.
Good luck.

Don

[james423]

Presuming that you feel this is someone who'd be receptive to nudism, the question would be hom much to tell them & how to introduce the subject into conversation. I've been told by friends that they go to a particular beach & ask if I go there as well, or someplace else. This presents an opening to mention the nude beach I go to (if I feel that the individual won't take it poorly). I've had people mention nude beaches & ask me if I would ever consider going to one. There are ways to politely let the person know that you're not opposed to nudity. I wouldn't just tell someone point blank "I'm a nudist", unless I felt pretty certain they would not be offended.

[nudetone]

Your best bet is to wait until it might naturally comes up in a conversation. Just matter of factly state whatever happens to be the situation (I've been to a nude beach before, I've gone skinny dipping, I never wear anything to bed, etc.) If this person is a close friend, they probably won't be surprised, and/or they will be supportive.

[Bob S.]

I am with Don here, ask yourself why you want to tell someone about nudism. Rik also makes a great point about what you want to tell them about. The other question is the who.

You have a lot of unanswered questions that need to be answered in order for us to give you more specific advice, if this advice isn't specific enough.

And remember, it is best to let the topic come up in conversation naturally unless you want to "comfess" out of the blue.

Bob S.

Well Jonathan, it depends on how many people you want to know. I told a few at work, and befor long EVERYONE there who knows me knew I live in a nudist reosrt. Of course, I don't care who knows.


NKDDON's advice is good and worth following. By the way, my name is also Jonathan.

[Outlaw]

I don't care who I tell. I don't like having to hold back information. It's like telling a lie. You have to remember what you said and to who.

If the people I tell are shocked or embarrassed by the truth about what I say and drop me as a friend, they weren't very good friends after all.

And besides, the more people we tell the more the word nudist gets into their mind and they know that more and more are into the naturist movement.

Mike

I lost what I thought was a friend that I had known for 20 years when she found out my ideas concerning nudity. I hadn't even gotten the chance to tell her I was a nudist.

[NoodJuggler]

That is a quick way to lose anywhere from 120 to 160 pounds isn't it? She must not have been very much of a friend to lose her over something as simple as nudity. It is probably for the best. I don't know the situation but just be glad that you weren't more involved with her, unless she is you exwife then be glad she's gone...Cheers...NoodJuggler. /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

No, Keith, she was just a friend or so I thought. I was "feeling" her out to see what she thought about nudity before telling her I had gotten into nudism. We had been members of the same church. She had gotten offended over a nude photo of my 2-year-old daughter and thought that it was just terrible! All I said was that I wasn't offended by nudity, and she informed me in an e-mail that we couldn't be friends any longer. I guess she didn't have the nerve to tell me to my face. It's easier to say things in writing.

[Trailscout]

Jon-Marc, that woman sure sounds extreme to me. I know plenty of folks who are proud to show off nude pictures of their kids and they are as textile as a cotton mill. I have a very textile friend whose kids played nude in the living room before and after their evening bath until they were about six years old.

I have had mixed reactions when I tell friends about being a nudist. With all the prudery these days, I think putting one toe in the water is a good idea lest you say too much to someone who is paranoid and he or she reports you to the law.

I had to laugh at the man who called the police to report that his male neighbor was not wearing a shirt in his own yard. I am glad that the police warned him never to call about that again!

[luvnaturism]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Jon-Marc:
...She had gotten offended over a nude photo of my 2-year-old daughter and thought that it was just terrible! All I said was that I wasn't offended by nudity, and she informed me in an e-mail that we couldn't be friends any longer. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>Your "friend" was obviously a deeply troubled person, and somehow the picture and your comment touched a wound. It wouldn't surprise me if she had been sexually molested as a child.

So...the incident wasn't about you at all. You just happened to be standing on the corner when the accident happened.

Fortunately, in my experience most people haven't reacted so vehemently against nudity when it's mentioned, and I've mentioned it to a lot of people. They may be embarrassed at the subject, but they just brush it aside and go on. Once in a while you come across someone who has an extreme reaction to seeing or even just hearing about nudity. Those people have a very serious problem and don't know it.

"in my experience most people haven't react so vehemently against nudity when it's mentioned"

My wife recently started working with a lady who is an ardent naturist. People at her work ask her about it - sometimes even chuckle at the thought of her walking about in the buff - but nobody thinks any worse of her for it.

"Once in a while you come across someone who has an extreme reaction to seeing or even just hearing about nudity."

I have never encountered anyone who reacts that way, Jon-Marc. Do they have some sort of religious objection? If it doesn't affect them then I fail to see why they should get uptight about what other people do on the privacy of their own beaches etc.

Stu

[Nudeinbama]

Jon-Marc, I read your post yesterday about losing a freind over learning of your interest in nudity and I kinda wanted to post and say I'm sorry to hear a freind could cut you loose over that but I guess people are just that way and I did'nt and don't understand it all and did'nt know quite what to say, but we'll be who we are and they'll be who they are and we'll all cary on .For whatever it all means!
nudeinbama

If someone rejects me over my belief that the nude body isn't indecent, then I can live with that, and I can live without them.

[shãybare]

Sounds to me, Jon-Marc as though she has a dirty mind.

Have things warmed up enough at Turtle to go swinmming yet?

It's in the 80's here, Shay, and I've been enjoying it. We've had quite a bit of sunshine in between the rain. I never cease to be amazed at the unpleasant things I actually anjoy doing when I'm nude--particularly yardwork. When you wash your car nude, you don't have to worry about getting your clothes wet. I enjoy riding my bicycle nude, but then EVERYTHING is better nude--depending on the weather.

[sawdust]

My wife and I shared with a friend of 20+ years that we were nudist. Over time I have seen three different positions come from this one person. The first was, "That's OK for you, but I would never do that!" The second, which came within a few weeks was a distancing, but not verbalized attitude towards us of, "you must be weired and I have to protect myself and family from you." And most reciently, a third attitude that, nudism seems a bit strange but interesting. Some conversation between us as concerns nudism is being allowed. Some times these nude concepts things just take time to settle in. Sawdust

[Nude in the North]

Two years ago I told a Niece that I was a nudist and that I skinnydipped in my pool out back.
Her first response was "That's just Wrong! Nobody should see you naked except your wife."

One year later she was tanning in my pool wearing nothing but a thong and bikini top, (she's still not ready to go nude) while I grilled burgers in the nude.

Sometimes they have a change of opinion. Sometimes they don't.
The important thing is to keep the lines of communication open. Don't push it too hard. And try not to totally shock them out of their minds in the beginning.

Steve

[Stevedaoust]

If you feel that you need to COME OUT to feel comfortable with the other half of your life, then yah bring it up but be casual and matter-of-fact about it. NEVER apologise for your lifestyle; hold your head up and state it clearly. Tell whoever that you hit this cool nude beach or wherever and be open about it, answer all questions matter-of-factly. If you show embarrassment about it you loose the "it's for comfort thing" factor and it gets twisted into sex.
I don't make it a point to walk around with a billboard sign on my chest but I don't HIDE the fact that I'm a nudist either. Nudity is a COMFORT thing for me. Wear it proud.

Steve

[Vin]

Oddly enough, I think some of my friends who know of my interest in nudity had an easier time with that than with the Paganism thing. It seems to be all in the perspective. /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

That said, and to answer the original question, I think you just wait for the topic to come up in conversation. With good friends, almost every possible topic comes up sooner or later. If they're not good friends, why tell them anyway?

Vin

[Joe Nudist]

All my friend at work know I'm Nudist. Both women and men at work.

[Chief78CJ7]

If our parents love us no matter what..
And the presiding opinion is that people aren't usually appalled by nudity...

..why don't nudist tell their parents their nudists? hmm...

[sawdust]

Chief,
Much depends on the relarionship "we children" have with our parents. Most children do not want to be an offence to their parents, their beliefs and the way they chose to raise them. Not because they fear reprisals necessarily but because we just don't want to hurt them in any way. Some parents could feel that they have failed their child or that the child failed them with this current belief of social nudism. Sensitivity for a love of our parents prevents many nudist from making their nudist life known. Naturally there are some parents who would not mind at all knowing this about their children, but they are not every body. It is concern for those parents who would not understand and see it as their failure in their childs up bringing, that silence as concerns nudity is kept to ones self. As a parent myself, I would love my child through all things but I could still be hurt by somthing they might do or say. Sawdust

[JayFromFLA]

There is nothing "to tell" I don't tell people I enjoy clothes free recreation differently than the way I tell them that I play golf. If someone asks I say yes, if I think someone else might enjoy it I ask, if it comes up some other way, I acknowledge it.

I don't think we are as much special cases as we think we are (due to our own scrutiny and worries).

Having just overcome this problem myself, I can tell you that having had seven people "find out" in just under a month, six were "Oh man, that's cool" or "I want to try this" and only one giggly school girl reaction, which I don't count as negative, only immature.

It will be ok! You don't have "big news" to tell them, this is just a part of your life like anything else. This mindset has helped me.

[Trailscout]

I don't think of being nude as a form of recreation, but perhaps some do. In my case, nudism is part of my value system that says that it is okay to live in the natural human condition. It has something to do with respect for my body, a desire to experience my environment without the sensory deprivation effect of clothing, a little bit of rebel in me, and because being nudist in a hostile society has forced us to create a community, I enjoy hobnobbing in nudist enclaves when the opportunity presents itself. I like the ethic of family nudism.

I have nothing against people who are not nudist, but who feel free enough to spend a day at the beach without clothes. When push comes to shove, they might take our side in a legal battle.

I am not even sure if it is helpful to define myself as a nudist because my nudist ethic is merely a natural outgrowth of my overall world view.

This stuff is way too heavy to lay on people in a casual conversation. I do bring it up in a deep conversation, but in a broader context.

My childhood role models taught me bits and pieces of this ethic by example, no preaching or long discourses.

[Chief78CJ7]

I will tell my parents.. and soon, just so I can get over that "you probably should call if you want me to be clothed" thing.

Honesty always brings freedom from worrying about who's on the "know" list and "don't know" list. And Honesty is one thing I want to have with my parents.

And most of all.. I simply don't want to 'go running' when someone comes down my driveway and am stopping doing that. So, anyone that I know that may simply show up, I tell them.. they're a part of my life and I don't want to offend them. It's not about being seen, it's about being naked, but I don't HAVE to be naked if someone would rather not see it. I will always be the type to harass them into letting me feel comfortable in my own home.. heh.. but I don't want to make it so they won't come.. ya know?

Nudity is not a "recreational" thing for me. It's an intregral part of my life.

[Lilwilly]

Ironically my father had nudist tendencies but I was always too selfconcious to admit to my tendencies to nudity. (The shame implied by our society.) My younger brother told my mother but I never did. I would gladly do so now but it is too late, they are both gone.

[james423]

I've told a few friends, including some people at work. However, I never told my parents about my nudism. My father, who probably would have been OK with it, passed away nearly 10 years ago. My mother has frequently voiced her opposition to nudity in movies & plays, so I don't plan on telling her. Some other family members know, but I only know of one who actively participates in nude activities (but I wouldn't be terribly surprised if a couple of the others had at least tried it on occasion).

[OZJames]

Last weekend we stayed with friends near the beach and in the course of conversation we told them that we spend a lot of the time nude at home on our farm.

We managed to get them to take us to the nearby C/F beach (Shelly Beach near Foster in NSW Australia). Unfortunatly it was a bit cool and there was no one else on the beach so not having any examples to follow (except us) they stayed clothed while we swam and lay in the sun.

We have learnt not to have any fear of telling others of our nudist tendancies.

JAMES

[nudistmatt]

well youcould bring it up as, "media nude incident". listen to their response and then say how you feel about it.

[shãybare]

Now, I have no problem telling others I am a nudist. When I first realized I was a nudist, many years ago, it was difficult because I was afraid how others would take it. Over the years I have learned that most are not all that concerned about it as long as I do it out of their sight. There was a time, too, that I would always cover up if friends or family were coming over. My attitude changed about the "out-of-respect" approach to covering up and decided that when I visit them, I would wear clothes but when they came to see me it would be clothing optional.

Like Jon-Marc and some others on the forum, nudism for me is not a recreational thing. It is a lifestyle and one that I am a very firm believer in. Clothes are not for modesty. I use them for safety, comfort and when I go to town.