How do I tell my family? [Archive]

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ak72

10-30-2005, 03:27 PM

I am 15 and have pretty much done all I could nude within my house when I was home alone. I have also let them "accidentaly" see me nude. I have a 10 year old brother, a 13 year old sister, and a mom and a dad. I would like to introduce my brother to nudism first but he tends to be compleatly opposite to whateve I tell him that dosen't have to do with sports, and whenever he sees me nude he growns and looks away. My sister would listen to me but I don't know if the gender gap would cause any problems. And I really have no idea about my parents but would like to at least get one sibline into nudism first.

Also I will be getting my license in a couple of months and live about an hour away from haulover beach. However I would want to go get someone into nudism and have them come with me. There are two people that I would feel comfortable with, one guy one girl. I'm not sure but I think the guy would be someone who would go with me just to look at naked people. And I don't know if the girl would think I just wanted to see her naked.

Any tips?

ak72

10-30-2005, 03:27 PM

Doodles

10-30-2005, 04:06 PM

Welcome to the boards! It mainly depends on how open minded are your family, siblings and friends and what attitude do they have towards nudity. There are families who would allow casual nudity around the house- like getting out of the shower without a towel and so- and there are families who would be completely against it. My advice is to 'dip a toe and test the water.' Throw a hint or a conversation opener about nudism without actually coming out to them straightaway, something like 'one of my friends is going to Haulover this weekend' or 'one of my friends is a nudist' sort of thing and see how will they react to it. Same goes to your friends too. Perhaps you can start wearing less around the house too, hang out in boxers and a T and see if you'll get any comments, positive or negative. The most important thing is to avoid 'shocking' them, taking the matter step by step will let you know how they think and will make it much less of a surprise to them when you finally decide to break the news. I wouldn't tell them if I know they'd take it the wrong way as well - the last thing you need is problems with your family.

nudenwv

10-30-2005, 06:01 PM

take it slow. i would first approach mom or dad. makeing sure they approved but if they were not the kind i would keep it a secret til i got older. my parents to this day do not know of my nude lifestyle as siblings don't know either. only my wife and grown daughter know and of course the nudist friends that i have made. you just have to enjoy any nude time you can get and maybe start with finding a friend before approaching the family.

luvnaturism

10-30-2005, 06:17 PM

First things first. Do you know that your parents would react negatively?

If you have found in the past that you can bring up sensitive issues with one or both of your parents, then you might just do that with this question. You would be so much further ahead, and build so much more trust for when you get that driver's license, if you could just directly find some agreement that everyone can be comfortable with.

If that open conversation isn't available to you, then you may be back to going nude to and from the shower, and perhaps extending from there to see what your family will tolerate.

This may not apply to your situation, but I do know a family in which the parents are extremely modest about nudity; however they mentioned to us that their teenage son had no modesty at all about being nude around the house. Our impression was that they didn't quite understand it, but it wasn't issue for them. That family also had a teen daughter.

rudedogii

10-30-2005, 06:38 PM

Dude, You know best on your familys views on public nudity. If their OK with it, I don't think you should have much of a problem. But if there like my family, maybe you should just keep things to your self.
When I was your age I could not even walk around the the house with out a shirt.
Good post maybe you will get better advice if you post on the Young Naturist form.
Good luck and welcome. Rudedog

tinner666

10-31-2005, 05:39 AM

You're gonna have to play it by ear. Maybe by letting them keep finding you nude or getting them to join you in a night time skinny-dipping session somewhere. Do you or a friend have a pool? Sorry I can't offer more, but one answer doesn't fit every situation. Frank

ak72

10-31-2005, 08:53 AM

OK, I've talked to my brother. He dosen't really like the idea, but he dosen't mind if I'm nude every once in a while. I'll talk to my sister in a few days. But for now I'm just gonna keep letting them find me nude and wait for them to say something.

Argofan

10-31-2005, 10:25 AM

I think it's fantastic ak72 that you have come out now and told your brother, normally people are a little sheepish to the idea when first told, it takes a bit of time, before them become a little more receptive, so just take your time, ease into it, at least he wasn't overly upset or anything like that, so be thankful for that.

10-31-2005, 12:12 PM

I never cease to be amazed at how society has conditioned kids so that they're uncomfortable seeing their own brother nude. I was nude around my brothers and saw them nude, and it was no big deal to any of us since we were all built the same.

NudstRalph

10-31-2005, 01:02 PM

I know what you mean, it can go both ways. If you just search for family nudism at google there might be some information regarding kids that enjoy nudism/naturist but the rest of the family not into it or doesn't know about it. I would do homework about it and get some input but don't go to fast. Take baby steps. I do have some info at my website for families but not sure if that is what you are looking for. ak72, If you do find something about teens telling there parents let me know cause that is a good subject to know.

NudstRalph

10-31-2005, 03:58 PM

Ok I have did some searching and found a website for young nudist/naturist
Young Naturist Association (http://www.ynai.com)

Good Luck!

Florida Cracker

11-01-2005, 03:36 AM

I agree with others here. You have talked to your brother. Now just let him become acclimated to your nudity over time. Sometimes too much talking can give a subject more weight than it needs and turn someone off. Just go nude sometimes around him and he will get used to it pretty fast and probably join you when he sees there is no reason not to. Have fun nude!
Florida Cracker

11-01-2005, 05:53 AM

I agree with Florida Cracker. I had an adult nephew who was very opposed to me being nude. He lived with me for a while after his separation from his wife, and I gradually got him used to my nudity until I could be nude ALL the time. I even got him to go with me once to a nudist resort. He was nude all the time he was there.

LeeR49

11-01-2005, 07:59 AM

With all the talk about the impending death of nudism due to the lack of interest among those under the age of ancient, it's alway refreshing to find another teen who is interested in good nudity and wants to pursue it. I wish you the best.

For years, I, too, was afraid of telling anyone, especially my parents. In fact, I was about 43 before I got the guts to talk to Dad about it. I was visiting my parents in Florida, and had pretty well made the decision that, if at all possible, I was going to bring up the topic while I was there. When the opportunity came along, I approached it in an indirect way -- like Doodles suggested. I was absolutely shocked to find that Dad was ready to talk about it. Now, some 10 years later, he is almost a full-time at-home nudist, and, while he has yet to go public, he seems, if anything, to be a little miffed that I haven't either. (My wife has not been as accepting as Dad, so I still restrict my nakedness to home, and only when the kids aren't here, out of respect for their wishes.) And Mom has at least grown to accept that her husband and son like to be nude when possible, and has occasionally joined Dad in the at-home thing.

Point is, you just never know how your parents might react until you take the bold step. I suggest you start with a value they have, and show how nudism reflects that same value. For example, my parents and I are all Evangelical Christians. Right away, in the first conversation I had with Dad, I let him know how many Evangelicals are involved in nudism, and shared with him a couple issues of Fig Leaf Forum (http://www.figleafforum.com). Another possibility is that sexual purity, or positive self esteem, or physical and mental health are high values to your parents. Whatever values your parents have, be ready to demonstrate to them that many, if not most, nudists have those same values, and you will quickly find them on board.

Again, I wish you the best. You never know, you may even have more success than I have, and bring your entire family into this wonderful way of life.

Lee

Bob S.

11-02-2005, 09:48 PM

ak, as others have mentioned, you know your family best and we cannot accurately give you advice on how to introduce them.

Since you have decided to go the casual visual route, i wish you luck. But also try to come up with an answer before they ask you about your nudity.

Will there be a problem with your sister? Probably. If your brother is put off by your nudity, your sister, who is in the most modest part of her life, may be somewhat averse to your nudity. Of course, she may surprise you.

Who to bring to Haulover? Well, even if your guy friend may not be the best pick, you could still try to bring him along anyway. You could smack some sense into him if he does ever start to become rude.

If you want to ask your girl friend, tell her that you want to have someone whom you trust accompany you on your first trip. There is no reason to get undressed at the beach and you could let her know that.

Good luck.

Bob S.

justnude

11-04-2005, 11:03 AM

I would agree with BobS on your first visit to Haulover. I have been there several times and find there is a nice mix of clothed and nude folks so there is no "pressure" for either of you to be nude. My question to you would be, how comfortable are you with your girlfriend? She might not be the best choice to go along with you for your first attempt at public nudity as there just might be a bit of a sexual feeling there. Just a thought....

ak72

11-05-2005, 11:09 AM

Well my brother has become more and more adverse to my nudity. I have decided to try my sister in the next few days. Like you said Bob, my sister will probably be adverse but I hope she surprises me.

With my friends, I'm going to try and steer conversations in a direction where I could bring up nudity and try to ease in that way.

Thanks for all of the advice, I'll let you know how it goes.

tinner666

11-06-2005, 04:08 PM

Don't force it on them, but when they find you nude, be extremely casual about it. Not defensive, not aggressive. Nonchalant, easy does it. Frank http://clothesfreeforums.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

NudeAl

11-06-2005, 04:11 PM

I agree play it off as a non-issue like any other hobby stamp collecting etc. No big deal, like oh yeah you didn't know well yes I like going to nude beaches etc when I can.

Jeff Brooks

11-06-2005, 04:21 PM

I grew up in a very liberal home. Nudity was everywhere so that is how we have raised our children. Our daughther is not into being nude but our son definitely is, I would be shocked if I came home and he wasn't naked. The guy has been getting nude as soon as he has entered the door since he was 6. He is now in college. I would go slow with exposing others to nudity. Nobody likes to be offended.

JB

lenne

11-22-2005, 12:30 PM

I became a nudist by my boyfriend and I hadn't had any trouble at all to tell my parents.
There very-open minded and when I told them, they said to me that they don't mind and that they also like the idea of being a nudist.
I think you should just tell it to them straight away and start with the person who you feel most comfortable with by telling.
(I always tell stuff like this to my mother)