View Full Version : Tis the season to be scary!!
R.M. Greenman
10-08-2003, 10:19 PM
Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road?
It had no guts! /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif
How do witches keep their hair in place while flying?
With SCARE spray!
What goes HA HA HA CLOMP CLOMP?
A zombie laughing his head off! /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif
Why is it easy to play poker in a graveyard?
You can always dig up an extra player!
Why do zombies have a hard time playing poker?
They keep throwing in their hands! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
What do you call a zombie in a sleeping bag?
A burrito! /infopop/emoticons/icon_redface.gif
AND NOW, A JOKE FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY:
What did the zombie tell the hooker?
Keep the tip!
R.M. Greenman
10-08-2003, 10:19 PM
Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road?
It had no guts! /infopop/emoticons/icon_rolleyes.gif
How do witches keep their hair in place while flying?
With SCARE spray!
What goes HA HA HA CLOMP CLOMP?
A zombie laughing his head off! /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif
Why is it easy to play poker in a graveyard?
You can always dig up an extra player!
Why do zombies have a hard time playing poker?
They keep throwing in their hands! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
What do you call a zombie in a sleeping bag?
A burrito! /infopop/emoticons/icon_redface.gif
AND NOW, A JOKE FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY:
What did the zombie tell the hooker?
Keep the tip!
WARNING: For those of you who are easily frightened or those with heart conditions please do not click on the link.....the rest of you beware! /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif
CIVIL WAR GHOST
Apparently the owners of this house had been seeing images and hearing voices for quite sometime. They did some research and found that a lady once lived in the house who lost her husband during the civil war.
Legend says that she used to sit at the table and look across the fields in anticipation of her loved one returning home. He never came.
So, they say she still waits.
They caught this photo of what they claim to be her. This one was a wild and a little spooky once you find the ghost in the picture. It took me a few seconds to find it, but when you do, it just stands out.
Like one of those optical illusions. To save you some time, concentrate around the table. Best not to focus too much on one spot. Look around
the table and toward the window. It takes a few minutes for your eyes to focus on it, so don't give up. *For added touch, turn up the volume. It's faint, but you can hear the ghost talking sometimes in a low murmur.
Remember, to turn up your volume up; or you may not hear anything!!!
Also, note that it may take a minute or so before you pick out the ghost,so give it a try!!
Now, go immediately to the address below.type it in exactly as written!
http://home.attbi.com/~n9ivo/whatswrong.swf
/infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif
It's very good - I find it best to just let the mind relax completely and after about 30 seconds or so you'll be able to see it.
/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
That was very good. I about jumped out of my skin when I saw and heard it.
R.M. Greenman
10-09-2003, 08:52 PM
A filk with apologies to Tiny Tim:
Tip toe,through the tombstones,
through the gravesites,
through the rotting flesh,
Come tip toe, through the tombstones,with meeee!
Too much Haunted House work for me!
How many Vampires does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Yeah, like that'll happen!
Anyhow, three vampires walk into a bar. The bartender asks the nosferatus what they'll have.
One says," I'll have some AB+"
2nd one says,"Make it two!"
3rd one says,"I'll go for some plasma."
"So," says the bartender," that'll be two bloods and a blood light?"
Which witch is watching the wicked witch wind her wrist watch?
R.M. Greenman
10-12-2003, 10:14 PM
/infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif NEW AVITAR
gamblefish
10-13-2003, 03:58 AM
RM, is it the invisible man?
A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone.
He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he
took his costume and away he went.
The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain; and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume
was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.
She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived.
She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little
fun. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.
She was sitting up reading when he came in and asked what kind of a time he had. He said, "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."
Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"
He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But I'll tell you....
the guy I loaned my costume to sure had a real good time!" /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif
R.M. Greenman
10-13-2003, 10:07 PM
Maybe it will show now!
R.M. Greenman
10-13-2003, 10:33 PM
hw, cute story.
Some boys and girls were at a party one night.There was a graveyard down the street, and they started to talk about how spooky it was.
"Don't ever stand on a grave after dark," one of the boys said. "the person inside will grab you and pull you under."
"That is not true," one of the girls said."It is just a superstition!"
"I'll give you a dollar if you stand on a grave." said the boy
"A grave doesn't scare me," she said"I'll do it right now!"
The boy gave her a knife and said,"Stick this knife in one of the graves so we will know you were there."
She picked out a grave and stood on it. Then quickly she bent over and plunged the knife into the soil, and started to leave. But she couldn't get away. Something was holding her back! She tried a second time to leave, but she couldn't move. She was filled with terror!
"Something HAS got me!" she screamed, and she fell to the ground.
When she didn't come back, the others went to look for her. They found her body sprawled across the grave. Without realizing it, she had plunged the knife through her skirt and had pinned it to the ground. It was only the knife that held her. She passed out due to fright!
Yet another thing that would not happen to a nudist.
Thanks RM....Cool Avitar you have there! /infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif
gamblefish
10-31-2003, 03:46 AM
Top 10 reasons Trick Or Treating is better then sex........
10. Guaranteed to at least get a little something in the sack.
9. If you get tired, wait 10 mins and go at it again.
8. The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.
7. You don't have to compliment the person who gave you candy.
6. It's OK when the person you're with fantasizes you're someone else,
because you are someone else.
5. 40 years from now, you'll still enjoy candy.
4. If you don't get what you want, you can always go next door.
3. Doesn't matter if the kids hear you moaning and groaning.
2. Less guilt the next morning.
And the number 1 reason Trick Or Treating is better than sex....
You can *DO* the whole neighborhood!!!
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