Illinois Wife says she'll go! But.....

[elgintom]

Hi all,
Well I'm pretty sure my wife is going to go with me to check out a resort. Now my problem is finding somewhere close that allows clothing to be worn. She will only go for the day and will not get undressed. I wanted to go to SRH but you must be nude to shower or swim. I want this to be a positive expierience for her so she'll go again but..... It would be nice to find a couple that could take us under their wing and show us around. SRH would have been great but.
Tom

[elgintom]

Hi all,
Well I'm pretty sure my wife is going to go with me to check out a resort. Now my problem is finding somewhere close that allows clothing to be worn. She will only go for the day and will not get undressed. I wanted to go to SRH but you must be nude to shower or swim. I want this to be a positive expierience for her so she'll go again but..... It would be nice to find a couple that could take us under their wing and show us around. SRH would have been great but.
Tom

[Al Bundy]

Hi Tom, Al here. That is great that your wife has agreed to join you. Perhaps you could contact the management at SRH and inquire if they require first time vistors to disrobe. Most venues allow first timers to remain clothed during their initial visit. You mentioned that your wife would not be able to swim due to the chlorine allergy. I am not positive but in the past I have observed people wearing swim suits sunning on the pool patio. I believe you are correct that you must be nude to enter the pool. If you are game for a long drive, you migt try Maz just west of Madison. I have not been there for a number of years but I am sure nudity is not required.

Congratulations on convincing your wife to join you. Give me your secret as I am getting nowhere with mine.

[davewis]

Tom,

Maybe you could buy your wife one of the wraps that I see the ladies wearing. Its like a very large scarf. Covers from breasts down to past the waist. SO, still covered but not a swim suit. Saw a few ladies with those on this past weekend. Then if she felt comfortble she could uncover the top if she felt comfortable. Lots of ladies do stay covered on bottom half. I dont hink anyone wold say anyting to her if she stayed coverd. Mazo Beach is an option. But thas a bit of a drive. Just west of Madison Wis.

[Pete Knight]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by davewis:
Tom,

Maybe you could buy your wife one of the wraps that I see the ladies wearing. Its like a very large scarf. Covers from breasts down to past the waist. SO, still covered but not a swim suit. Saw a few ladies with those on this past weekend. Then if she felt comfortble she could uncover the top if she felt comfortable. Lots of ladies do stay covered on bottom half. I dont hink anyone wold say anyting to her if she stayed coverd. Mazo Beach is an option. But thas a bit of a drive. Just west of Madison Wis. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

The garment I believe you are refering to is a sarong, it can be worn by men too, only around the waist to cover just the lower regions, I'll try to arrange a photo of me wearing mine if you like!!

The ladies can either wear the sarong around the upper chest to cover boobs and lower regions, or as I saw recently, it can be tied halter neck style, which looks great, its a very versatile garment.

Pete Knight

[elgintom]

Hey all, She loves me! That's the ONLY reason she is even considering going. She will not undress, period. She has large breasts and are a bit saggy so she's embarrssed of them. Oh well, I did e-mail SRH to see if thye could help me out. They are by far the best, cleanest and friendliest group I've been around.

[Nu]

Good luck, elgintom:

Perhaps once you and your wife are there, she may (at her decision) decide to go clothes free.

None of us are perfect. We come in all shapes and sizes.

[elgintom]

Well I heard from SRH and they told me that if she wouldn't disrobe then forget the pool area. hey said we could visit the rest of the resort but without knowing anyone or having anything to do then I think that would be a waste of my one opportunity. Still looking.

[Al Bundy]

Sorry to hear they will not allow clothing in the pool area. I know I have seen swim suits on the patio during one of my visits. I understand they have new management so this may be the difference.

I have to be honest and confess that I am very bored when there as I do not know anyone and usually just walk the road and soak up some rays at the pool.

Does the wife like to hike? Davewis said there are hiking trails by the pond but I have no idea where that is as I have never been given a tour of the grounds.

I know it would not help to tell the wife that body issues are nothing to worry about as it is difficult for non-nudists to grasp. I certainly have short comings http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/sad3.gif but there is nothing I can do about it and from my observation, nobody cares.

I was hoping you and the wife could join me for my birthday celebration. Another gift would be nice. http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/laugh.gif Good luck in your search.

[nudeM]

They require nudity in the pool area? Maybe they meant she could be clothed in the area, but in order to go swimming, she must disrobe. Maybe there is still hope. Good luck. http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/smoking.gif

[Tampanude]

The resort is not your only hope. May Isuggest saving up a bit and taking a trip to a clothing optional resort? You'll find it's a bit easier to make the transition. I brought my girlfriend (now wife) to one and she felt no pressure, just reassurance that it was HER choice.

After all, your wife has entrusted you, Go the extra to make it comfortable for her

http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/happy.gif

[missouriboy]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">She has large breasts and are a bit saggy so she's embarrssed of them. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>Concerns like this are very typical of most people, especially women, until they have their first experience. Just get her there, and don't dwell on it, or even mention it. When she sees lots of other women (and men!) with bodies less perfect than hers, usually a light will come on. For best results, let her discover this for herself, without anyone pointing it out to her.

Good luck! http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/happy.gif

[elgintom]

Hey Tampa,
I keep telling her that I would like to go for a week and she says "you keep telling me that!" So I respond, and I will keep telling you until I hear you say "let's go!
I told her about SRH and she told me that her being naked is out of the question. She won't even make love without something on. She told me that as much as I like to be nude, that's how much she likes to be covered. I asked her to get nude with me at home, swimming, sitting on the patio, lounge around the house or whatever. She considered it, but doesn't think that would stop me from wanting to be with other nudists. And, it probably wouldn't. I would like to think that if she would, that would satisfy my desire but I honestly couldn't say that it would. It's so very hard to meet nudists in the area without going to a resort. I joined CSC and went bowling but it was 90% men and most were single. I need to find non swinging couples. I'm going a bit long here so that's it for now.
Tom

[OldFrog]

A couple of thoughts here, Tom.

First, the fact that she has agreed to accompany you to a resort as long as she can stay clothed indicates that she at least doesn't think that you are perverted for wanting to. It is also a positive thing that she has at least considered lounging around the house with only you there. If you could get to that point you might increase her confidence level to take the next step. If not, it would still be enjoyable and better than what you have now.

Second, there are some people who never do "get it". My wife was not at all shy about her body in private and we slept nude. She thought nothing at all about breast feeding in front of other people (she used a towel over the shoulder in public but not if we were with friends). Other than the breast feeding, though, she was never able to separate nudity from sex. We didn't have sex with or around other people so she was not going to take her clothes off with or around them either.

[Naturist Mark]

I'm not sure I see what the problem is. Take her along, she doesn't have to be nude, you can be. No pressure. She'll see lots of naked people with ordinary bodies, and will notice that she isn't any different. You can spend a short time swimming without her, then sun with her on the lawn, or play petanque or tennis or build a fire and roast hot dogs.

At the end of a busy day you can relax in the hot tub, and if she wishes, she can join you. Chances are, by then, she will.

I say go for it. Even if she never gets nude you'll both have a good time.

-Mark

[elgintom]

I agree with 100%
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by OldFrog:
A couple of thoughts here, Tom.

First, the fact that she has agreed to accompany you to a resort as long as she can stay clothed indicates that she at least doesn't think that you are perverted for wanting to. It is also a positive thing that she has at least considered lounging around the house with only you there. If you could get to that point you might increase her confidence level to take the next step. If not, it would still be enjoyable and better than what you have now.

Second, there are some people who never do "get it". My wife was not at all shy about her body in private and we slept nude. She thought nothing at all about breast feeding in front of other people (she used a towel over the shoulder in public but not if we were with friends). Other than the breast feeding, though, she was never able to separate nudity from sex. We didn't have sex with or around other people so she was not going to take her clothes off with or around them either. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

[elgintom]

I am going to go for it. I will say this one more time MY WIFE WILL NOT BE NUDE OUTSIDE OF THE SHOWER! NOT IN THE BEDROOM NOT IN PUBLIC NOT IN THE DARK. She likes to wear clothes as much as I liketo be naked.
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by elgintom:
I agree with 100%
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by OldFrog:
A couple of thoughts here, Tom.

First, the fact that she has agreed to accompany you to a resort as long as she can stay clothed indicates that she at least doesn't think that you are perverted for wanting to. It is also a positive thing that she has at least considered lounging around the house with only you there. If you could get to that point you might increase her confidence level to take the next step. If not, it would still be enjoyable and better than what you have now.

Second, there are some people who never do "get it". My wife was not at all shy about her body in private and we slept nude. She thought nothing at all about breast feeding in front of other people (she used a towel over the shoulder in public but not if we were with friends). Other than the breast feeding, though, she was never able to separate nudity from sex. We didn't have sex with or around other people so she was not going to take her clothes off with or around them either. </div></BLOCKQUOTE> </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

[Tampanude]

Best of luck to you, bro. Patience is a virtue, love is forever

http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/happy.gif

[Al Bundy]

Hey Tom, I think SRH is really blowing it. They could have a potential new member if they would allow first time vistors to stay clothed until they felt comfortable nude, and if they do not reach the comfort zone, at least the club did all they could do to help the person decide if nudism was for them. Sounds like they need a marketing manager there.

Would your wife be willing to participate in this forum? If so, perhaps some of our wonderful female members that grace this site would relay their story on how they became nudists and the personal hangups they had to overcome.

Well Tom, I think your best bet is to head to Mazo if you would like to stay local or take a trip down to Paradise Lakes where it is clothing optional. The staff at PL are friendly and helpful.

[elgintom]

pl told me it's a swinger place i called today

[Tampanude]

http://www.paradiselakes.com/resort%20overview.htm

[Tampanude]

Funny, you seemed quite genuine for a while

[Tampanude]

And yes, we know quite a few of the staff and members

[Naturist Mark]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by elgintom:
pl told me it's a swinger place i called today </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Sun Ray Hills is an AANR club - not a swinger resort. I've never been there, but know people who have been - no reports of open or rampant swinging. So I wouldn't worry.

We've all heard stories about after hours swinging at Paradise Lakes in Florida - although it is not officially tolerated. I'm told it is not as bad as some claim.

-Mark

[Al Bundy]

It has been a couple of years since I visted PL and unless they have had a major change, I question the terminology of Swinger Resort. I was there for 5 days and did not notice any of this activity the entire time. As a matter of fact, security personnel patroled the area and strongly discouraged any physical contact even between married couples. Based upon my last visit there, I would recommend it as you could be nude and the wife could remain clothed. She could even wear a swim suit in the pool. Anyway, I wish you luck in your quest.

[elgintom]

I called and talked to them. They told me that oral sex takes place by the pool. Saturday night is a swingers mixer and swinging goes on by the pool. Are we talking about the same place?

[Al Bundy]

I am speaking of Paradise Lakes in Land of Lakes Florida. I doubt that club management would allow employee's to bill the resort as a swingers venue. As I stated in a previous post, I did not see any evidence of this while a guest at the resort. Of course what goes on behind closed doors between consenting adults is a different story and this could take place at any venue. I still recommend PL for you and your wife.

[elgintom]

Ah! Paradise Creeks is in Illinois.

[Naturist Mark]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Ah! Paradise Creeks is in Illinois. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
There is no club named "Paradise Creek(s)" that is affiliated with AANR or TNS. It is probably a "Lifestyle" (swinger) club.

-Mark

[John P]

Well, Paradise Lakes does have quite a reputation as a swingers' hangout, though whether a guy on his own would be invited to participate is doubtful. An acquaintance of mine who posts here has said he and his wife went to PL and were solicited "Three times in the first couple of hours". Maybe he'll confirm that but he may not want to.

But here's the really quirky thing. At Paradise Lakes there are swingers and people often go around clothed. But at Lake Como, which is almost next door, they don't allow swingers and people are nude. I think that tells you something about how people feel about sex and nudity.

[elgintom]

We had a great time. Wife stayed in bathing suit. She met some very nice people and was not uncomfortable being the only one with clothes on. She will go back! It was pretty hot so we only stayed until 2. Since she could't go in the pool, I took her home to cool off. She appreciated that.

[Al Bundy]

Hey Tom, where did you end up going? Now that you convinced your wife to accompany you, pehaps you can convince mine. http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/beam.gif

[elgintom]

Al... Went SRH. There was a parade and hot dogs and live music. The wife stayed in bathing suit but told me she had a good time and didn't mind all the nude people at all. Said "I've never seen so many bare butts at one time in my life!" Every body was nice. She said she'd go back but would still not get undressed.
Tom

[luvnaturism]

Looks to me like you're each making a wise accomodation to the other. Good for you both. With enough experiences like this your wife may at least get to the point where she can lose her clothes in private moments with you, but then again maybe not.

Pressure doesn't get you anywhere good, but love, acceptance, and lots and lots of appreciation for being willing to go with you to a place where you can be nude with others can work wonders.

I know that general area near Lake Geneva. That's a beautiful part of the country, so I assume it's nice at SRH.

[elgintom]

Sometimes my patience wears a little thin. It will take me at least a year or two to get her to even think about it. She just hates being nude. Says she like clothes as much as I like being nude.

[David Shrimpton]

Give it up tom, your beating a dead horse. MY wife is exactley the same, at least you got her to go with you. but is sounds like she will never go totally nude. I have been married for 31 years and my wife is horrified at the thought of me seeing her nude. sorry to throw a wet blanket on your hopes,but she,s never going to do it.just go without her and try to enjoy yourself. I know its hard to accept when you see other couples at nudist parks and wish your wife would be as uninhibited as his wife. The hardest thing is accepting it, thank god she doesn,t mind your nudism. Good Luck.

[Al Bundy]

Glad to hear you both had a good time at SRH. I have a lot of respect for your wife for accompanying you. I am planning on going to SRH tommorow 8/3/06 if the weather is decent. Hope to meet some forum members while there.