Gay Nudists

Hi, I'm looking for any gay or bisexual nudists, preferably under 30, near Chicago, or farther away.

[Rabid_Clam]

That should not be a problem but this is a nudist forum. Please be careful to limit your interest to naturism and not the active part of gay life and all will be fine here.

Good luck!

[MoonShadow]

The active part of gay life? What did you mean by this, Rabid_Clam?

[Rabid_Clam]

I was trying to tactifully express abstinance from sexual matters. The man is new here and just wanted to help him get off on the correct footing. No harm intended to anyone.

[Boreas]

Originally posted by Rabid_Clam:
I was trying to tactifully express abstinance from sexual matters. The man is new here and just wanted to help him get off on the correct footing. No harm intended to anyone.

I hope you meant to suggest that this is a naturist forum, not a dating forum. It looks at first glance like you were responding to the fact he was looking for gay or bi-sexual nudists.

[Croydon]

Originally posted by Still_Boreas:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Rabid_Clam:
I was trying to tactifully express abstinance from sexual matters. The man is new here and just wanted to help him get off on the correct footing. No harm intended to anyone.

I hope you meant to suggest that this is a naturist forum, not a dating forum. It looks at first glance like you were responding to the fact he was looking for gay or bi-sexual nudists. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
The whole comment by Rabid was quite unnecessary.

Should I say the same thing for couples who come on this site seeking to meet with other couples. I should help couples on this site get off on correct footing by tactifully expressing abstinance from sexual matters like swinging, for example.

[NudeTopher]

Originally posted by Croydon:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Still_Boreas:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Rabid_Clam:
I was trying to tactifully express abstinance from sexual matters. The man is new here and just wanted to help him get off on the correct footing. No harm intended to anyone.

I hope you meant to suggest that this is a naturist forum, not a dating forum. It looks at first glance like you were responding to the fact he was looking for gay or bi-sexual nudists. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
The whole comment by Rabid was quite unnecessary.

Should I say the same thing for couples who come on this site seeking to meet with other couples. I should help couples on this site get off on correct footing by tactifully expressing abstinance from sexual matters like swinging, for example. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

To keep Rabid happy please be certain to NOT say anything offensive to heterosexual couples. Of course, homosexuals are fair game Perhaps Rabid is truly rabid. (If he starts in with the hate the sin but lover the sinner please just shoot me!)

[Boreas]

Should I say the same thing for couples who come on this site seeking to meet with other couples. I should help couples on this site get off on correct footing by tactifully expressing abstinance from sexual matters like swinging, for example.

That is what I hoped he was saying.

[nudefarmer]

As a gay man, I find nothing offensive in what RClam posted. It might have been rather clumsily said, but I take no offense in the underlying message.

On a quick read, Vadik's initial post and his interests from his profile "I'm open for anything, as long as we do it nude." could sound like he's looking for a hook up.

Communicating on a forum or by e-mail is always dodgy.

[xgsft]

Originally posted by nudefarmer:
As a gay man, I find nothing offensive in what RClam posted. It might have been rather clumsily said, but I take no offense in the underlying message.

On a quick read, Vadik's initial post and his interests from his profile "I'm open for anything, as long as we do it nude." could sound like he's looking for a hook up.

Communicating on a forum or by e-mail is always dodgy.

Agreed, there was nothing implied in what Rabid said. Give the man the benefit of the doubt and move on.

[Croydon]

Originally posted by nudefarmer:
As a gay man, I find nothing offensive in what RClam posted. It might have been rather clumsily said, but I take no offense in the underlying message.

On a quick read, Vadik's initial post and his interests from his profile "I'm open for anything, as long as we do it nude." could sound like he's looking for a hook up.

Communicating on a forum or by e-mail is always dodgy.
Let me put it this way for you N-Farmer. Had Vadik been a couple seeking to meet other couples, do you think RCalm would have posted that message?

Had Vadik been a man seeking female nudist, would he have posted that message?

Had Vadik been a female nudist, seeking other female nudist or couples, would he have posted that message?

The point: Vadik is being singled out based on assumptions of stereotype and "gay lifestyle." Because he is seeking gay nudists, RClam had to post a message to "remind" Vadik that this a nudist forum and one to abstaine from the "active part of gay life."

The question is, what that necessary? How come RClam does not give that stern message to ANYONE who post seeking to meet others?

As for the "I'm open for anything..." comment from Vadik, it is quite a big jump in assumption to say he is seeking hook up. I read his profile and that thought never crossed my mind. I never spoke to him so I don't know where he is coming from. He could have mean that he is open to going to beach, hike, resort, or hanging out as long as it is nude.

Vadik has only posted on this forum twice. Once stating he is 19 y/o student and seeking other young nudist. Second post is the above. It is obvious he would like to make some young adult nudist friends OR friends with gay nudists. He wants to interact with nudists he has something in common with.

[Longhairbear]

I am a nudist. I am Scottish. I am into classic cars. I am gay. Pick one, and we are sure to get along.

[nakedjohn]

I pick nudist.

[Eric6420]

Hi Vadik,

We are a few gay men here, so you will be quite lucky if you find a gay man in your area even though Chicago is a big city.

I think that as a gay naturist, it is easier to find other gay naturists in gay campgrounds than in naturist ones.

In Québec, most gay campings are either clothing optional or have a naturist section. So most gay naturists go to gay campings instead of naturists campings where, at least here in Québec, gay couples are not always welcome, not to mention that naturists campings tend to have very sricts rules such as "Two naked bodies must never touch each other in any way". That means that you cannot put solar cream on the back of your partner in some naturist centers.

For meating other gay naturists, I think you would be luckier to place your profile on a gay meating service such as PlanetOut or Gay.com, even though there is nothing wrong to search for a gay naturist here. Be aware that most members here are heterosexuals and some of them have posted comments that were quite homophobic.

[usuallylurk]

Married straight guy here. But there is a SIG (special interest group) within the Naturist Society called the fullSpectrum SIG.

At any Naturist Society Festival or Gathering, they usually hold or sponsor a few events, which are open to all.

My suggestion is, if you're interested, call or write The Naturist Society for more information.

[BlobbyBob]

Unless you are looking to meet someone for a relationship, why would you specify a sexual preference in a post like this? If I was looking just to make friends I'd perhaps post some interests, but just being a specific sexual orientation isn't surely a requirement for being friends. Also, I can't imagine that just because you are of the same sexual preference as another person that you'd necessarily get along with them.

Can I ask - if someone came on here and posted "Hi, I'm looking for straight people to be friends with, none of those gays" how much of a fuss do you think would be kicked up about it?

[Pete Knight]

Originally posted by BlobbyBob:
Unless you are looking to meet someone for a relationship, why would you specify a sexual preference in a post like this? If I was looking just to make friends I'd perhaps post some interests, but just being a specific sexual orientation isn't surely a requirement for being friends. Also, I can't imagine that just because you are of the same sexual preference as another person that you'd necessarily get along with them.

Can I ask - if someone came on here and posted "Hi, I'm looking for straight people to be friends with, none of those gays" how much of a fuss do you think would be kicked up about it?

I can go along with that, also what if a guy came on and posted, "I'm looking for girls 18-25" which isn't what this board is about really, I mean there are enough dating sites, much as Eric6420 has pointed out, so the fact that Rabid Clam pointed this out to a gay poster has been jumped on.
What if it had been a couple seeking another couple, that's very singlist and offensive to a lone chap like me, but do I kick up a fuss, no not I, although I have taken issue with resorts that only allow couples, I thought I was innocent until proved guilty!

There is also a gay dating site called Gaydar, I'm not sure of its full address, but a couple of friends of mine met through Gaydar.

I think we need to lighten up, and not be so twitchy, and I really didn't see anything homophobic in RC's post, on the other hand if he'd said, we don't want any of you poof's here on CFI, I would have been outraged too.

Lets get back to reality eh!

Pete Knight

[Eric6420]

I think that when a gay man wants to make a friend, it is quite important to say to the prospect friend that he is gay.

The problem is that fisrt of all, you are perceived as heterosexual until proven contrary, and you do not want to be friend with people who thinks that gays are perverts.

Of course, a lot of heterosexuals are very supportives of gays, but some are still quite hostile.

[justnude]

In reading the original post, I personally find nothing there to indicate anything unusual. It is human nature to want to have friends who share the same interest and/or background as you do. While the nudist "culture" tends to be more open to all folks, it is still very comforting for people to hang with folks who are similiar to themselves at times; much like there are SIGs for folks of a specific relegion, ethnic background etc. In short, give the guy a break-he was only looking to find friends (as we all are) to enjoy the nude life with. http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/happy.gif

BTW, I am a gay father of twins, one who happens to also be gay. While we do associate with "our own kind" at times, that does not make it sexual any more so then when we simply have "friends" over. In short, can't we all just get along here?

holy crap! i didn't expect this many people to respond. and i am not looking for sex on this site either. who ever suggested that is looking too heavily on stereotypes. while i would like to find a gay friend who is into nudism, i don't necessarily want to date them. gay people don't just screw any random person that is gay. we have our types too you know. it's like heterosexual dating. by the way, the reason i wanted to meet someone under 30 is that im 19 and it is a little uncommfortable to get along well with people who are much older than me and have different interests.

[BlobbyBob]

Originally posted by Vadik:
i am not looking for sex on this site either. who ever suggested that is looking too heavily on stereotypes. while i would like to find a gay friend who is into nudism, i don't necessarily want to date them. gay people don't just screw any random person that is gay. we have our types too you know. it's like heterosexual dating.
I don't think anyone is suggesting that you want to get together and shag any old guy just because you're gay - the point many of us were simply making is that if you're only looking for a friend, we wondered why the need of bringing sexuality into it at all. Fair enough if you want to mention that you, yourself are gay, so you don't make a friend who you later find out is a bigot after you tell them that you're gay - but surely just because someone is gay and you are gay, it wouldn't make you better friends. Why not ask for people who like the same music as you or enjoy the same sports? Just being gay doesn't define anything about you, no more than any other sexual preference, so asking only for gay friends is just as offensive as a person asking only for straight friends.

[Boreas]

Vadik, I hope this doesn't scare you away! You find all kinds of folks in here. Some more articulate than others.

Welcome to CFI.

[Born Nude]

As a new member, I apologize for coming into this thread a little late. While I don't think anything was meant by the initial post, I think the responses and subsequent thread does highlight one of the many differences between being a "nudist" and being a "gay nudist."

There is a strong belief by many, though I am sure not so much on this forum, that a gay nudist is looking for something more than just friends who share the naturist lifestyle. There is a belief that gay men are more sexual (shall I say promiscuous) than others in society. As many of my gay brethren will tell you, while there is an element of that, this is just a generalization. Generalizations exist in all subcultures, or as I call them, stereotypes.

Sadly, there are a number of non-gay individuals that would feel threatened if they were to find out that one of the guys in "the group" was gay. Gosh, there are some gay individuals who think that way. I've found it to better to be upfront about being gay, just to avoid that awkwardness from occurring (in a surprised fashion).

There are a number of straight guys (my generalization is that it always seems to be this group), that just don't like the idea of getting naked with a gay guy. Even though I don't think you should wear your sexuality on your sleeve, in some cases, it's just the better thing to do, so as to avoid issues later on.

Sorry for the ramble, but this thread just said "reply" to me :-)

James

[Eric6420]

There are a number of straight guys (my generalization is that it always seems to be this group), that just don't like the idea of getting naked with a gay guy.

What you say here is an understatment. A lot of men and women are still quite homophobic.

Some people ask me why there are gay bars and gay places. The answer is that if a gay male couple would do the same thing as straight couples do in a straight place, there could be a lot of problems. The reality is that homophobia and intolerance are still quite strong in most places.

[Born Nude]

The "safe places" that many subcultures create exist because there is a perceived threat (and in some cases a real threat). We have gay bars, women only spaces, etc. and these provide safe spaces where people can "be themselves." I question whether we will ever be in a society where we won't need these types of places ... in my view, doubtful.

It's important to note that not all the threats that people feel are always "real," and are sometimes created by the group that needs to be protected (based on our own stereotypes). For example, many gay men feel threatened by straight men, due (in part) to the belief that the straight man will react negatively when they find out a guy is gay (women don't tend to have these same issues). I know that not every straight man is threatened by gay men, but I still react differently when I am meeting a straight guy versus a gay guy (or a woman, for that matter).

We all have our own stereotypes, including our own internal ones (I recognize I have them). My own perceptions of people have probably caused me to loose the opportunity to really meet some phenomenal people. Sometimes we need to be reminded that it's not always the other person that appears to be intolerant. We are all intolerant at times.

What does this have to do with the post? I'm not sure :-) All I know is that clothes are what provide the status that people assign to each other, and when we are all nude, we don't have that status, and in some way, we are all equal.

Hmmm... maybe I need some sleep :-)

[furrbudtx]

somehow id reather be with sane and safe people then in a bar or place full of guys who dont get family, integrity and respect . Yeah .. I am a dad and gay but you wouldnt know it normally.