how to get friends and family involved?

[Dinnj]

I have a situation maybe some of you die hard naked people can help me with. I've been going to nude beaches for the past 10 years, (I'm 34) mostly alone. I have a very solid group of friends and famly, and we are all pretty liberal fun loving and open minded, although with a few exceptions (vacations in far away exotic locations) no one has ever tried it out, despite the fact that we live within a mile of Sandy Hook. Over the past couple of years, I have pretty much been open with the fact that I like going to the nude beach there. If the topic comes up, I get asked the usual questions and I make it a point to clear up the cliched misconceptions. Most of our circle seems at least mildly curious; and more than a few have expressed to me that they would like to at least check it out. I think it would be cool to get more people into nudism in general and would like to be able to not have to sit alone at the beach. The problem is, my wife won't go and get naked around people we know. I kind of feel weird about it myself. This summer I feel like I am ready to just go all out. My questions are what is the best way to do it? Should I be sneaky and engineer "accidentally" meeting some people we know at the beach? And how do I make sure it won't it be uncomfortable after the beach, when were all back in clothes? its not like back in college when everyone would streak or hot tub or whatever and it didn't matter because everyone pretty much drunkenly slept with each other eventually anyway; nowadays it is different, I've met all these people after college and we are all profesional MONOGAMOUS people with families and young kids. Anyone else ever dealt with this kind of thing? Looking forward to replies and thanks in advance.

[Dinnj]

I have a situation maybe some of you die hard naked people can help me with. I've been going to nude beaches for the past 10 years, (I'm 34) mostly alone. I have a very solid group of friends and famly, and we are all pretty liberal fun loving and open minded, although with a few exceptions (vacations in far away exotic locations) no one has ever tried it out, despite the fact that we live within a mile of Sandy Hook. Over the past couple of years, I have pretty much been open with the fact that I like going to the nude beach there. If the topic comes up, I get asked the usual questions and I make it a point to clear up the cliched misconceptions. Most of our circle seems at least mildly curious; and more than a few have expressed to me that they would like to at least check it out. I think it would be cool to get more people into nudism in general and would like to be able to not have to sit alone at the beach. The problem is, my wife won't go and get naked around people we know. I kind of feel weird about it myself. This summer I feel like I am ready to just go all out. My questions are what is the best way to do it? Should I be sneaky and engineer "accidentally" meeting some people we know at the beach? And how do I make sure it won't it be uncomfortable after the beach, when were all back in clothes? its not like back in college when everyone would streak or hot tub or whatever and it didn't matter because everyone pretty much drunkenly slept with each other eventually anyway; nowadays it is different, I've met all these people after college and we are all profesional MONOGAMOUS people with families and young kids. Anyone else ever dealt with this kind of thing? Looking forward to replies and thanks in advance.

[FireProf]

Seems like all your ducks are in a row here, the only thing missing is someone to open the conversation and keep it going til you all decide on a date to go to Sandy Hook.

Those that are interested will agree to go immediately. If my suspicions are correct, all the other ducklings will follow in line soon after.

Good luck. http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/wink3.gif

[tinner666]

You're missing one point. I invite my neighbors and some DO come. Have even met a few from here. When nude together at a resort or beach, "You're all in the same boat". It ceases to be an issue.
Like hiding it from somebody. When you and that person meet nude, you're on equal terms with nothing to hide. It becomes a NON-issue real fast. Nudes tend to look each other in the eye and have heart to hearts, not look to looks! http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/confused.gif
I hope this rambling helps, instead of muddies the issue. http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/happy.gif

[justnude]

Dinnj: As I read your post I am confused on the references you have made to nudity and sexual coupling. They need not be a pairing! It would appear that since your current friends are aware of your interest in nude visits to Sandy Hook, it would be appropriate to simply say-"Care to join us?" at the next such conversation. I understand that many folks are ok with being nude whern they are in a situation in which they do not know the folks around them. From personal experience-it is much more fun when you do know the folks and share the same experience. If your wife is uncomfortable, she should remain clothed until she feels more at ease around your friends.

[DenitaLC]

Dinnj:

My question: Has your wife ever gone to a nude beach with you or had a public nude experience? How does she feel about it? If not, I'd suggest you and she just go alone until she is comfortable on the nude beach and with herself when nude in public. She may not want to have to deal with that nervousness of the first time AND her friends there too.

I think lots of conversation and communication on this subject is your best approach. Setting up some "accidental" meeting will most likely backfire on you. She will see the set up and NOT be happy!

Good luck!
Dee

[Red Baron]

I think Dee is right about the "accidental" meeting. And I think she may have hit on something that could work in your favor. If you can get your wife to participate, that may well help convince some of the other wives to do so. And I can almost guarantee that if the wives go along, the men will follow (if not voluntarily, then by the ring in their nose).

[Dinnj]

>>>My question: Has your wife ever gone to a nude beach with you or had a public nude experience?

unfortunately not. she says she isn't happy with her body and wouldn't feel comfortable. (She isn't fat at all) I tell her thats the whole point, it makes you more comfortable. I've clipped articles, all that stuff. Nothing works, she ain't buyin it.

[DenitaLC]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Dinnj:
>>>My question: Has your wife ever gone to a nude beach with you or had a public nude experience?

unfortunately not. she says she isn't happy with her body and wouldn't feel comfortable. (She isn't fat at all) I tell her thats the whole point, it makes you more comfortable. I've clipped articles, all that stuff. Nothing works, she ain't buyin it. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

Well, that pretty much says that she isn't worried about seeing her friends naked, she's worried about THEM seeing her naked. Body image/acceptance is a hard thing to improve in some people....even when they look GREAT to others. She first has to feel good about herself and get over all of societies falsehoods about "how" we are supposed to look. I think a c/o beach would be perfect. Tell her that she can stay in her bikini all day. Perhaps if she saw the variety of people using the beach, she would see how easy it is to fit in, no matter what you look like!

Good luck...I hope she will change her mind and go with you, even if she stays clothed. It's a very bonding experience for couples!

http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/happy.gif
Dee

[lovebeingnude]

My wife had pretty much the same issue - Didn't want anyone seeing her body. When I took her to a CO beach, and she kept her bathing suit on, but with the high % of single men, she felt that all eyes were on her.

The ice breaker was when I took her on a romantic vacation to Jamaica. We stayed at Couples, Ocho Rios. They have a "au natural" island. I didn't pressure her at all to go over, but eventually curiosity got the cat and we went over. She was still a little shy over there, but it was a good experience.

She wants to go again (when we can afford it). She says she would be willing to spend more time over on the island http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/wink3.gif

[JF1569]

Well, good luck...as for me, and I've posted this here elsewhere, I would never want to be around my parents or family nude. NEVER.
Friends are different, but in no way would I want to have anything to do with my parents, sister, or any relative nude.

[Unwired]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by JF1569:

Friends are different, but in no way would I want to have anything to do with my parents, sister, or any relative nude. </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

That's actually a fairly common issue, and I include myself in that group. It's much easier for me to be nude around friends, and especially new nudist acquaintances, than around family.



UW

[tinner666]

Been an issue with me, but if we're all nude, instead of just the wife and I, I don't think it will matter. I have invited family members to join us, but they haven't, yet.

[Duneman]

We have a hot tub on our patio, which is nice and private, (it also has a "Skinny Dippers Welcome" sign over the entrance!) Almost all of our friends and relatives know of our naturist lifestyle, and I think almost everybody that has stayed at our house has stripped to use it!

That includes two sisters of mine.... some first timers are shy though, so we'll let them get in the tub first, and then we'll join them.

One long time friend ours is very shy and very concious of being over weight, and she is now quite confortable going nude with us in the tub.

Duneman

[nacktman]

We have a pool and a hot tub and both have signs posted reading "No swimsuits allowed in pool/hot tub".

So whenever family and friends come by and yearn to get wet they know they must do so sans clothes.

Many first time visitors jump at the chance for a dip in either and few even bat an eye at the nude requirement ... even the hardcase holdouts (and there have been three I can think of) eventualy dive in wearing the suit they were born with ... I think that the fact we're nude when they arrived might have a teeny bit to do with it.

This works for us to get friends and family involved. It can work for you. We have had trips to resorts and beaches planned in the hot tub many times.

Heck, this time of the year and throughout the summer and early fall I am liable to come home from work and find any number of the wife's 'girlfriends' swimming or sunning around the pool au natural (sometimes without the wife being there ... off on one of her 'shopping sprees' with still other friends most of the time when she's not about the pool). Maybe a husband or boyfriend will have beat home from work and be there as well, if not they arrive in a steady stream shortly after.

Then the evening's "party" begins ... which can be a blast when we all bring something for the grill, but is a real downer for the unlucky stiff who's turn to feed the hungry grill in the corner if no one brings anything ... and it's happened ... not often, but it has. http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/wink3.gif