Outhouse Poetry

[nacktman]

<span class="ev_code_RED">Don't know the original author of the following</span> <span class="ev_code_GREEN">BUT,</span> <span class="ev_code_RED">he had to have experienced the thrill of a winter's trip to the little house and the end of the path for himself to have waxed so eloquently.</span>

When the snow is on the outhouse,
and the frost is on the seat;
It's then that Nature's Duty calls,
and you move on hurried feet!

You don't have time to shovel
so you waller through the snow;
And you don't need a weatherman
to know it's four below!

You make a quick deposit
and tear a page or two
of last year's mail house catalog -
or even a corn cob will do!

Then to the house and fireside
you hurry without fail ...
with frozen stuff hanging from your nose
and frostbite on your tail!

[OZJames]

THE REDBACK ON THE TOILET SEAT
by Slim Newton
There was a redback on the toilet seat
When I was there last night.
I didn't see him in the dark,
But boy I felt his bite.
I jumped high up into the air
And when I hit the ground,
That crafty redback spider
Wasn't nowhere to be found.
I rushed into the missus,
Told her just where I'd been bit.
She grabbed a cut-throat razor-blade
And I nearly took a fit.
I said, "Just forget what's on your mind
And call a doctor please,
'Cause I got a feeling that your cure
Is worse than the disease."
There was a redback on the toilet seat
When I was there last night.
I didn't see him in the dark,
But boy I felt his bite.
And now I'm here in hospital
A sad and sorry sight,
And I curse the redback spider
On the toilet seat last night.
I can't lie down, I can't sit up
And I don't know what to do,
And all the nurses think it's funny
But that's not my point of view.
I tell you its embarassing,
And that's to say the least,
That I'm too sick to eat a bit
While that spider had a feast.
And when I get back home again
I tell you what I'll do,
I'll make that redback suffer
For the pain I'm going through.
I've had so many needles
That I'm looking like a sieve,
And I promise you that spider
Hasn't very long to live.
There was a redback on the toilet seat
When I was there last night.
I didn't see him in the dark,
But boy I felt his bite.
But now I'm here in hospital
A sad and sorry sight,
And I curse the redback spider
On the toilet seat last night.

http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/beam.gif <span class="ev_code_RED">JAMES</span> http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/beam.gif

[Qikdraw]

I need to learn spanish to read all the nice poetry in construction porta-potties. Spanish is such a beautiful language I am sure what they are saying is just beautiful poetry as well.

Qikdraw

[ncnudlady]

Oh the joys of life! http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/wink3.gif

Funny stuff! http://oakhurstonline.com/icon/laugh.gif