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Fun & Humor Naturists seem to be such comedians. Here is a special place opened by popular demand. This is where you can present iour skills as a comedian, nudist related or not. No off color jokes allowed.

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  #1  
Old 04-18-2003, 08:18 PM
stevenf64 stevenf64 is offline
Bronze Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: massachussetts
Posts: 263
stevenf64 is an unknown quantity at this point
Recently, I was diagnosed with AAADD:

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decided to wash my car.

As I start toward the garage,

I spotted the mail on the hall table.

I should go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay the car keys on the table,

put the junk mail in the trash can under the table,

and notice that the trash can is full.

So, I put the bills back on the table and take out the trash first.

Since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway,

I might as well pay the bills first.

I see my checkbook on the table,

but there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,

so I go to my desk,

where I find the bottle of juice that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks,

but first I need to push the juice aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

But the juice is getting warm,

and should be put in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

Heading toward the kitchen with the juice,

a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye.

They need to be watered.

I set the juice down on the counter,

and find my reading glasses,

for which I've been searching all morning.

I had better put them back on my desk,

but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter,

fill a container with water,

and suddenly spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

Tonight when we sit down to watch TV,

we will be looking for the remote,

but nobody will remember that it's on the kitchen table.

I should put it back in the den where it belongs,

but first I'll water the flowers.

I splash some water on the flowers,

but most of it spills on the floor.

So, I put the remote back down on the table,

and get some towels to wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: the car isn't washed,

the bills aren't paid, there is a warm bottle of juice sitting on the counter,

the flowers aren't watered,

there is still only one check in my checkbook,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

I'm trying to figure out why nothing got done today;

it's quite baffling because I know I was busy all day long,

and I'm really tired.

I know this is a serious problem,

and I'll try to get some help for it,

but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you?

Forward this message to whoever you think might enjoy it,

because I don't remember who I've already sent it to.
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  #2  
Old 04-18-2003, 08:18 PM
stevenf64 stevenf64 is offline
Bronze Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: massachussetts
Posts: 263
stevenf64 is an unknown quantity at this point
Recently, I was diagnosed with AAADD:

Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decided to wash my car.

As I start toward the garage,

I spotted the mail on the hall table.

I should go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay the car keys on the table,

put the junk mail in the trash can under the table,

and notice that the trash can is full.

So, I put the bills back on the table and take out the trash first.

Since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway,

I might as well pay the bills first.

I see my checkbook on the table,

but there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study,

so I go to my desk,

where I find the bottle of juice that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks,

but first I need to push the juice aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

But the juice is getting warm,

and should be put in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

Heading toward the kitchen with the juice,

a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye.

They need to be watered.

I set the juice down on the counter,

and find my reading glasses,

for which I've been searching all morning.

I had better put them back on my desk,

but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter,

fill a container with water,

and suddenly spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table.

Tonight when we sit down to watch TV,

we will be looking for the remote,

but nobody will remember that it's on the kitchen table.

I should put it back in the den where it belongs,

but first I'll water the flowers.

I splash some water on the flowers,

but most of it spills on the floor.

So, I put the remote back down on the table,

and get some towels to wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day: the car isn't washed,

the bills aren't paid, there is a warm bottle of juice sitting on the counter,

the flowers aren't watered,

there is still only one check in my checkbook,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

I'm trying to figure out why nothing got done today;

it's quite baffling because I know I was busy all day long,

and I'm really tired.

I know this is a serious problem,

and I'll try to get some help for it,

but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you?

Forward this message to whoever you think might enjoy it,

because I don't remember who I've already sent it to.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 04-18-2003, 09:29 PM
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Well, Steven, that sounds a lot like me. I enjoyed it very much. I can't imagine how many things I've lost in this house and can't find. I keep buying the same thing over and over because I can't find the one I bought and can't remember buying it. Then I find all of them. I put my glasses on top of my head and wonder where they are. I carry my car keys in my hand and then can't find them. I have to put everything in a specific place every time, or I won't know where it is and will hunt frantically for it. And just think--I'm not even a "senior citizen" yet! [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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  #4  
Old 04-19-2003, 07:55 AM
fred950 fred950 is offline
Bronze Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Kenosha,Wis U.S.A.
Posts: 839
fred950 is an unknown quantity at this point
Same here, Jon-Mark. But to me the realy wierd part is if someone asks about some obscure event that happened twenty years ago or what my parents telephone number was forty years ago...No problem.
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  #5  
Old 04-19-2003, 08:53 AM
shãybare's Avatar
shãybare shãybare is offline
Silver Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Shady Point, Oklahoma
Posts: 1,611
shãybare is on a distinguished road
I would like to respond but I forgot what I was going to say.

Forever Nude,
Shaybare
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Forever Nude,
Shãybare

Born Nude, Live Nude, Die Nude

Just a small pebble making a ripple in a large pond.
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  #6  
Old 04-19-2003, 11:27 AM
Suntied Suntied is offline
Bronze Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Posts: 356
Suntied is an unknown quantity at this point
I was going to respond, but I can't find my fingers... so I typed with my nose. You will all find ways to overcome these... what was I saying?
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  #7  
Old 04-19-2003, 02:23 PM
gamblefish gamblefish is offline
Bronze Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Canton, Ohio
Posts: 818
gamblefish is an unknown quantity at this point
I was gonna respond but...oh, hell I can't top "can't find my fingers".....blast you Suntied!

I am learning to focus now more on what I am trying to do so that I do not go off-track and forget what I was doing and wind up in the parking lot of WalMart wondering what I am doing there and where is my car and why am I naked and..........oh boy...
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  #8  
Old 04-19-2003, 03:21 PM
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
I've often gotten into my car and started to pull out of the driveway only to stop and ask myself, "Where am I going?" I often start to write down something on my grocery list only to forget what it was. I walk from the kitchen to the bedroom to get something and can't remember what it was. I've called people and left a message on their answering machine to call me back. When they did I forgot why I called them. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif[/img]
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  #9  
Old 04-19-2003, 10:20 PM
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Gee ...I'm glad to know I'm not the only one thats......?????...hmmmm [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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  #10  
Old 04-20-2003, 05:32 AM
missouriboy missouriboy is offline
Gold Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: small town, MO
Posts: 2,494
missouriboy is on a distinguished road
quote:
Originally posted by gamblefish:
[qb]...wind up in the parking lot of WalMart wondering what I am doing there and where is my car and why am I naked and..........oh boy...[/qb]
Weren't you supposed to reveal this in the "Naked Dreams" thread? [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif[/img]
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