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New Naturists New to nude recreation? This area is the place to ask questions about what it is all about and what it is not about. Feel free to answer questions for the new and curious.

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  #1  
Old 11-22-2002, 08:18 PM
jason_a jason_a is offline
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I am 26 years old. I have never been nude around other people, but I want to give it a try. I think I would enjoy it. The only problem is that i want my wife to participate. I cannot seem to convince her that she might enjoy it. I told just try it once and if you don't like it I'll never ask to do it again. I really want to do this, but I also want her to be a part of it. If she continues to decline should I go ahead and go by myself? How can I convince her? Please help.
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  #2  
Old 11-22-2002, 08:18 PM
jason_a jason_a is offline
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I am 26 years old. I have never been nude around other people, but I want to give it a try. I think I would enjoy it. The only problem is that i want my wife to participate. I cannot seem to convince her that she might enjoy it. I told just try it once and if you don't like it I'll never ask to do it again. I really want to do this, but I also want her to be a part of it. If she continues to decline should I go ahead and go by myself? How can I convince her? Please help.
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  #3  
Old 11-22-2002, 08:36 PM
Bartamus Bartamus is offline
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Bartamus has a spectacular aura aboutBartamus has a spectacular aura about
Jason A..I would think that if you tried it by
yourself, she might give it a go just so she
wouldn't be left out. That's especially true
if you tried it and really enjoyed the experience.
By the way, welcome to the INA forum!
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Bart
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  #4  
Old 11-23-2002, 05:26 AM
jeep jeep is offline
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Location: sandiego
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Jason welcome;afew simple tips to start.Dont go alone,it will create a split in your marriage union.Go do outdoor thihgs like camping ,hiking etc.together.My wife an i started this way,it led to intimate outdoor activities while on picnics hiking etc. We progress to sunbathing,skinniny diping,with some of her relatives.This may take years,we dont to nude resorts my wife is not ready yet.Were,married 24 years now the progress has been worth the wait. Good luck Jeep
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  #5  
Old 11-23-2002, 06:03 AM
Rik Rik is offline
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I disagree with Jeep.If your marriage is strong it's hardly likely to fall apart because you want to do something she doesn't. Many a would-be naturist caves in to the demands of their non-nudist spouse and spend years resenting the fact that they can't do what they want and many couples make the mistake of always compromising when they disagree but the end result is that no-one gets what they really want and everyone gets what they don't really want. Either way the relationship is never strengthened by always capitulating.

I say go it alone but make sure you're completely open and honest about it. You'll both survive.

Rik
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  #6  
Old 11-23-2002, 08:19 AM
Trailscout Trailscout is offline
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Some people will never become nudists, but let's assume that your wife wasn't traumatized in her youth and that she is just a little shy and body-conscious.

If so, perhaps she could go to a nude beach with you and you could wear as little as you please and she could remain covered up in normal beachwear.

I know of one couple at a nudist resort. The first time I saw them, she kept her bathing suit bottom on and her husband was nude. One day, they both arrived at the pool in the nude. There was no fanfare; she just quietly decided that she was ready. I hope your wife will come to see nudity won't put her in the spotlight. She will be just like anyone else: comfortable!
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  #7  
Old 11-23-2002, 02:31 PM
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Welcome, Jason, to the forum. I'm no longer married and probably not qualified to answer, but here's my 2 cents worth.

Most nudist clubs and resorts are clothing optional. Tell your wife that she can remain clothed until she is ready to try partial or complete nudity. The same thing if you go to a nude beach.

If she still refuses, ask her if she would care if you went because you're interested in trying a new experience that you believe you would enjoy. Then you can excitedly tell her how wonderful it was to be free of clothes and that you would love to share it with her even if she remains clothed. Of course, she might think you're wanting to go for some reason other than just enjoying being nude outdoors with other people who also enjoy it, but she just might agree to go and try it. I had a man where I work interested in going to Turtle Lake Resort here in MI. When he asked his girlfriend about going, she asked him, "What are you up to? I know you're up to something." He won't go alone because he's afraid it would damage his relationship with her.

However, if you never go for fear of destroying your relationship, you could always resent that decision and wonder what fun you missed out on by giving in to her. Of course, you can't force her to go, but hopefully you can get her to give in a little at a time. Asking her to go and be nude with total strangers is a lot to ask, but she can start out being fully clothed and gradually wear a little less as time goes by. Good luck, and the key words are "patience" and "perseverence". Hopefully, she will gradually come around. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif[/img]
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  #8  
Old 11-23-2002, 09:40 PM
Bob S. Bob S. is offline
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Jason,

What you should do is start to go naked at home. Ask her to occasionally join you. And in these instances, do not make it out to be something sexual. Just watch TV or make dinner sans clothing.

She may take to it or not. But don't pressure her. And keep a dialogue open between you two regarding nudism and public nudity. She may allow you to go to a nudist park or beach, but keep in mind that a lot of parks are leery about accepting unaccompanied married persons to their parks. This is mainly, I believe, a legal tactic so that they cannot be dragged into a divorce case where one partner's practice of nudism is a factor.

Keep on trying. She may one day turn the corner. Good luck.

Bob S.
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Emily Robbins
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  #9  
Old 11-24-2002, 06:48 AM
Naked Bob 2 Naked Bob 2 is offline
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I agree with the previous post. Try it at home or in some other "safe" environment, perhaps a hotel with a private hot tub. She has to be comfortable with herself first. For some reason being in or around water is conducive to nudity.

Then you could try it with some trusted friends, backyard hot tub after dinner and a few drinks. You may look into joining on a trial basis a nonlanded club, a club without grounds. Quite a few of them have potlucks at club members homes they usually have a hot tub there. Most of these do not require nudity so she may remain clothed.

I would like to recomend our nude beaches if you live in an area that has them, but alas many of them are frequented by less than desirable types that may make it uncomfortable for a first timer. So I would not try these until she has progressed a bit.

If she is anything like my wife you will have to work to overcome a lot of her fears. Some of which may have to do with your motivation for doing this and your relationship and her own negative body image.

Have patience, be gentle but persistant, and always try to demonstrate the positive benfits you and her may derive from this. It took me several years to get my wife to go with me and yes I did go by myself durring that time. Good luck
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  #10  
Old 11-25-2002, 03:10 AM
greensunshine greensunshine is offline
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Dear Jason,

I would like to add my 2 cents worth in on this topic, from a female perspective who was married to a non nudist [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_redface.gif[/img] It wasn't me being a nudist that destroyed our marriage, it was other factors...so if your biggest concern is "What is it going to do negatively to your marriage," look at all the other other factors that could also be impacting your life together.

Sorry but chosing to run around naked with or without each other is just a copout for other things that could also destroy your marriage, such as in the case of mine, he was a closet alcohic amongst many other reasons why it failed.

Greensunshine [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img]
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And oh I forgot, no rain...and no beach either...
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