» Online Users: 146 |
| 42 members and 104 guests |
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| Most users ever online was 789, 01-05-2009 at 05:22 AM. |
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06-13-2003, 05:15 PM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 8
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Ok, I wanna here some funny jokes that aren't related to nudism. here's one to start us off.
So a family just went to church, and the little boy asks his father, "Daddy, is God black or white" and the dad replied "he's both son." Then the kid asked "Is god a man or woman" and his dad replied "He's both son." Then the kid quickly said "God is Michael Jackson?"
__________________
I come from a family of seven. Trust me, I'm always seeing someone naked.
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06-13-2003, 05:15 PM
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Junior Member
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 8
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Ok, I wanna here some funny jokes that aren't related to nudism. here's one to start us off.
So a family just went to church, and the little boy asks his father, "Daddy, is God black or white" and the dad replied "he's both son." Then the kid asked "Is god a man or woman" and his dad replied "He's both son." Then the kid quickly said "God is Michael Jackson?"
__________________
I come from a family of seven. Trust me, I'm always seeing someone naked.
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06-13-2003, 05:45 PM
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Gold Member
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Midwest, USA near St. Louis
Gender: 
CFI Member: Yes
Posts: 2,979
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A "joke" slandering anyone is unethical.
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06-13-2003, 06:03 PM
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That was great, Kim!
During a high school break-in in Plymouth. NC, two burglars found a camera in one of the classrooms and amused themselves by taking pictures of each other committing the crime. When they couldn't figure out how to get the film out of the camera, they concluded it wasn't loaded and left it behind. The men apparently didn't realize they'd been fooling around with a digital camera that stores pictures on a computer disk. Investigators downloaded the snapshots to a computer and got a complete photographic record of the break-in. The suspects were quickly arrested. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]
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06-13-2003, 10:08 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: New(d) Zealand
Gender:
CFI Member: No
Posts: 66
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What do u call an intellegent blonde?
a labrador.
Why dont the blind go skydiving?
it scares the hell out of the dog.
How does a blind skydiver know when he is close to the ground?
the leash goes slack.
Hear about the old guy who wakes up in the middle of the night and for the first time in ten years has an erection, he wakes his wife and shows her, and asks if they should do something with it.
she replys that see as though the wrinkles are out for a change, he should wash it.
__________________
if we were meant to be nude we would have been born that way.
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06-14-2003, 03:24 AM
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Jerry was helping his neighbor John do some renovations to John and Mary's bathroom. One of the things they had to redo was the old toilet.
They put the old one out on the driveway where they were gong to break it up with a sledgehammer.
While the toilet was sitting there, a 5-year-old neighbor came by. He looked at the toilet and asked John, "Why does Mrs. Taylor make you pee out here?"
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06-14-2003, 03:51 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: New(d) Zealand
Gender:
CFI Member: No
Posts: 66
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There was this couple that was married for 20 years, and every time they
made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the lights.
Well,after 20 years the wife felt this was stupid. She figured she would
break him out of the crazy habit.So one night, while they were in the
middle of a romantic session, she turned on the lights. She looked down
and saw her husband was holding a battery operated pleasure device. She
gets completely upset.
"You impotent bastard," she screamed at him,"how could you be lying to me
all of these years? You better explain yourself!"
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly, "I'll explain
the toy if you explain the kids."
__________________
if we were meant to be nude we would have been born that way.
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06-14-2003, 04:25 PM
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A blonde named Jenny was trying to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because it had 250,000 miles on it.
One day she told her problem to a friend, Jerry. He said, "There's a way to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."
"That doesn't matter," replied Jenny, "if only I can sell it."
"OK," said Jerry. "Here's the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you, and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000. Then it shouldn't be a problem selling it."
The following weekend, Jenny made the trip to the mechanic. Later, Jerry asked, "Did you sell your car?"
"No," replied Jenny, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it."
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06-14-2003, 04:42 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: New(d) Zealand
Gender:
CFI Member: No
Posts: 66
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In a trial a small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to
the stand, a grandmother. He approached her and asked, "Mrs Jones, do
you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you
since you were a young boy and frankly, you've been a big disappointment
to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk
about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you
haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more
than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you"
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across
the room and asked, "Mrs Jones, do you know the defence attorney?"
She again replied, "Yes, I do. I've known Mr Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, he has a drinking problem. He can't
build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of
the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife
with three different women. Yes, I know him"
The defense attorney almost died!
At this point, the judge brought the courtroom to silence, called both
counsellors to the bench, and in a very quiet voice said, "If either of
you bastards asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt"
__________________
if we were meant to be nude we would have been born that way.
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06-14-2003, 04:53 PM
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Member
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: New(d) Zealand
Gender:
CFI Member: No
Posts: 66
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He said, She said:
He said: Why do you women always try to impress us with your looks, not
with your brains?
She said: Because there is a bigger chance that a man is a moron than he is
blind.
__________________
if we were meant to be nude we would have been born that way.
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Naturists seem to be such comedians. Here is a special place opened by popular demand. This is where you can present iour skills as a comedian, nudist related or not. No off color jokes allowed.
