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Only a Southerner knows..

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  • Only a Southerner knows..

    Only a Southerner knows the difference between a "hissy fit" and a "caniption", and that you don't "have" them you "pitch" them.

    Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., constitutes a "mess" ... and we ain't givin' up our secrets to no Yankees.

    Only a Southerner can point out the general direction of "yonder".

    Only a Southeren knows exactly how long "directly" is - as in "Going to the store, be back directly".

    Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty bowl in the middle of the table.

    Only a Southerner knows when "by and by" is. They may not use the term but they know the concept well.

    Every Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis they also know to add a large banana puddin'.

    Every Southerner grows up knowing the difference between "right near" and "a far piece". They also know that "just down the road" can be one mile or twenty.

    Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a redneck, a good ol'boy, and po'white trash.

    No true Southerner would assume the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn.

    Every Southerner knows "fixin'," can be used as a noun or a verb.

    Southerners make friends while standing in lines. We don't do "qeues", we do "lines" and when we're "in line" we talk to everybody.

    Only Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

    Every Southerner knows that eggs, bacon, grits and iced tea are great together: that "red eye" gravy is a breakfast food and that fried green tomatoes are not.

    When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself a'lookin'," you are honored to be in the presence of a genuine Southerner.

    A true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at the little old lady that drives 30mph on the highway. Just just say "Bless her heart" and be on your way.

    To all of you that are still having a hard time understanding this Southern stuff: "Bless your hearts." They are a'fixin' to have classes in how to understand the Language of the Gods.

    For all those that were NOT born Southern, but have been here a long time need a sign for your front porch that reads, "I ain't originally from the South, but I got here as fast as I could!".

    (edited to correct misspellings and grammer)

  • #2
    as a southern boy...that brought a tear to my eye...LOL

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    • #3
      Thank you Nacktman; I was rasied in the North but both parents were from Tennessee. I used to love the vacations where life slowed down and people were polite to each other.

      In 5 yrs I will retire and hope to make Atlanta, GA area my home. Rick

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      • #4
        Thanks that made my day.

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        • #5
          I'm from smack in the middle of Missouri and I understood all of it!
          Spydyr

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          • #6
            Lewis Grizzard had a southernism that is appropriate for this forum. Naked means you don't have any clothes on. Nekkid means you don't have any clothes on and you're up to something.

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            • #7
              Nacktman,

              As they used to say on that great showcase of all things Southern, Hee Haw,

              SAL-UTE!!!!!

              Reb

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              • #8
                PS I like the First National Flag of the Confederacy you included.

                Reb

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                • #9
                  Yo Nacktman, You being a "southerner", is there any truth to the saying Yankees are the ones who visit and Dam Yankees are the ones that stay?
                  RunWell and Smooth-----roadrambler

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                  • #10
                    Thats the way it is roadrambler2
                    NudeinBama

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                    • #11
                      Rambler2 we won't even go into the third catagory - G*d [email protected] Yankees!

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                      • #12
                        Sorry i asked the question.I still love going down to that great part of the country even though i quess i'll allways be just a "Yankee"
                        Run Well and Smooth--------Roadrambler

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                        • #13
                          Why sorry you asked, we don't mind Yankees?
                          [email protected] Yankees is a 50/50 shot, depends on if they learn or not.

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                          • #14
                            I'm only Half Yankee.
                            I live in "Southern" Minnesota.

                            Steve

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                            • #15
                              quote:
                              I'm only Half Yankee.
                              I live in "Southern" Minnesota

                              Very funny!

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