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OK, this year is it for us. Empty nesting like a big bird, we are. Daughter in college will stay there and ladle gravy to the homeless.
Sons will coop with in-laws, out of town. Way, way, way out of town.
Aha! No obligations. Damn we deserve this, we really, really do.
No gathering of the clan, with grandma nipping the cooking sherry, dad cleaning his uzi in the living room, sister bringing her fifth husband (a 400 pound, pierced-eyebrows, free spirit dressed in a loin cloth) to introduce to the family, no brother-in-law coming out on the way to the church service, and grandpa chained to a tree in the back yard to keep him from running cars.
And none of Aunt Edna's Brussel Sprout souffle which renders one flatulent until after boxing day.
No sirree, not this year. I'm gonna crank up a big ole pot of Texas Red, kick back and watch me sum damn football, and take the damn phone off the hook.
What's your plans?
And here is the recipe for the best chili in the house. Real Texas chili, no beans, macaroni, cheese, raisins or any other scat that yaw'l damn yankees insist in ruining a good bowl of red with.
3-Alarm chili (Won big year after year at Terlingua and Luckenbach) Made that old reprobate Wick Fowler a rich man. A true Texas rags to riches story.
2 lbs of venison, buff, or very lean ground beef.
7 Tbsp of chili powder
1 Tbsp ground cumin (Iprefer fresh gound with mortor and pestle.
2 Tsp paprika (mostly for color-you don't want the heavy tasting Hungarian type)
1 sweet onion, finely chopped (medium to large) Vidalia or Noonday varity if you can find.
2 Tsp salt
2 Tbsp masa (you can use arrowroot or corn starch if you can't find masa)
1 8oz can tomato sauce.
1. Brown the meat and drain all grease and fat.
2. Stir in tomato sauce and 2 cans of water (water from the Brazos river works best, but make sure you strain and remove the tadpoles)
3. Mix all ingredients except cayene pepper and masa. And simmer 30-minutes
4. Add as much pepper as you desire--yankees take care here. San Antonians, you don't need my instructions.
5. Mix masa and 1/4 cup warm water and slowly add to chili and stir well and then simmer 20-minutes.
A quick word about the masa (or other thickener) this pulls all the flavors together and makes your chili so thick your spoon will stand up in it. It also gives your chili that deep soft red look rather than bright, soupy tomato red.
But..CAUTION, You must mix it well with WARM water before putting it into the chili, otherwise it will cook up into lumps. I generally, also drop in a tsp or so of the chili after I've got it mixed, just so it blends into the chili when I pour it in the pot.
It should be sneaky hot, not burn or scald your mouth or tongue or stomach, but about five minutes into it, you should begin to sweat like a pig under a wool blanket in August.
A FINAL WORD OF CAUTION TO YANKEES, YOU MAY WANT TO LET YOUR SLEEPING PARTNER KNOW THAT THEY MIGHT PREFER THE GUEST ROOM THAT NIGHT--ESPECIALLY IF YOU WASH IT DOWN WITH BEER.
Sons will coop with in-laws, out of town. Way, way, way out of town.
Aha! No obligations. Damn we deserve this, we really, really do.
No gathering of the clan, with grandma nipping the cooking sherry, dad cleaning his uzi in the living room, sister bringing her fifth husband (a 400 pound, pierced-eyebrows, free spirit dressed in a loin cloth) to introduce to the family, no brother-in-law coming out on the way to the church service, and grandpa chained to a tree in the back yard to keep him from running cars.
And none of Aunt Edna's Brussel Sprout souffle which renders one flatulent until after boxing day.
No sirree, not this year. I'm gonna crank up a big ole pot of Texas Red, kick back and watch me sum damn football, and take the damn phone off the hook.
What's your plans?
And here is the recipe for the best chili in the house. Real Texas chili, no beans, macaroni, cheese, raisins or any other scat that yaw'l damn yankees insist in ruining a good bowl of red with.
3-Alarm chili (Won big year after year at Terlingua and Luckenbach) Made that old reprobate Wick Fowler a rich man. A true Texas rags to riches story.
2 lbs of venison, buff, or very lean ground beef.
7 Tbsp of chili powder
1 Tbsp ground cumin (Iprefer fresh gound with mortor and pestle.
2 Tsp paprika (mostly for color-you don't want the heavy tasting Hungarian type)
1 sweet onion, finely chopped (medium to large) Vidalia or Noonday varity if you can find.
2 Tsp salt
2 Tbsp masa (you can use arrowroot or corn starch if you can't find masa)
1 8oz can tomato sauce.
1. Brown the meat and drain all grease and fat.
2. Stir in tomato sauce and 2 cans of water (water from the Brazos river works best, but make sure you strain and remove the tadpoles)
3. Mix all ingredients except cayene pepper and masa. And simmer 30-minutes
4. Add as much pepper as you desire--yankees take care here. San Antonians, you don't need my instructions.
5. Mix masa and 1/4 cup warm water and slowly add to chili and stir well and then simmer 20-minutes.
A quick word about the masa (or other thickener) this pulls all the flavors together and makes your chili so thick your spoon will stand up in it. It also gives your chili that deep soft red look rather than bright, soupy tomato red.
But..CAUTION, You must mix it well with WARM water before putting it into the chili, otherwise it will cook up into lumps. I generally, also drop in a tsp or so of the chili after I've got it mixed, just so it blends into the chili when I pour it in the pot.
It should be sneaky hot, not burn or scald your mouth or tongue or stomach, but about five minutes into it, you should begin to sweat like a pig under a wool blanket in August.
A FINAL WORD OF CAUTION TO YANKEES, YOU MAY WANT TO LET YOUR SLEEPING PARTNER KNOW THAT THEY MIGHT PREFER THE GUEST ROOM THAT NIGHT--ESPECIALLY IF YOU WASH IT DOWN WITH BEER.
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