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  • Nude with children

    I have a question but first I will need to give you the background of a situation.
    I was recently reminded of something I saw when we were in St. Martin last May. The wife and I were on the Club Orient portion of the beach and had just staked claim to a couple of lounge chairs when we saw a young man come walking along the beach. He had three children one holding his right hand maybe about 3 years old, a baby of may be 9 months old on his left arm and in his left hand he carried a diaper bag. He also had a back pack. This left a boy of about maybe 4 years old who was walking with his dad and hanging on to his father's penis. I started laughing and thought that the trio were cute. A little while later the wife joined the rest of her family and they seemed to have a funtime on the beach. The next day my wife and I were in Phllipsburg and saw this same couple and children shopping. The wife had the two smaller children, and the husband still had the 4 year old with him. The child was walking with his hand up the leg of the man's shorts. I said hello and talked briefly to the man. The entire time I was talking to the guy his son was still holding on to his dad under his shorts. I finally ask about it and man told me they were a family of nudist from Canada. The boy had grown up from an infant of only a few days old and had from the start formed an attachment to his privates. Now I am far from a prude but, I told him I realised it was his son and he was still young but, he should start trying to break the boy from this habbit because it could be viewed by some as possible child abuse. The man laughed and said he really did not see a problem with it at this time, as it keep his son quite and occupied. I simply finished the conversation and said see you around without further comment. OK, so my question is what do you all think of this situation?

  • #2
    I have a question but first I will need to give you the background of a situation.
    I was recently reminded of something I saw when we were in St. Martin last May. The wife and I were on the Club Orient portion of the beach and had just staked claim to a couple of lounge chairs when we saw a young man come walking along the beach. He had three children one holding his right hand maybe about 3 years old, a baby of may be 9 months old on his left arm and in his left hand he carried a diaper bag. He also had a back pack. This left a boy of about maybe 4 years old who was walking with his dad and hanging on to his father's penis. I started laughing and thought that the trio were cute. A little while later the wife joined the rest of her family and they seemed to have a funtime on the beach. The next day my wife and I were in Phllipsburg and saw this same couple and children shopping. The wife had the two smaller children, and the husband still had the 4 year old with him. The child was walking with his hand up the leg of the man's shorts. I said hello and talked briefly to the man. The entire time I was talking to the guy his son was still holding on to his dad under his shorts. I finally ask about it and man told me they were a family of nudist from Canada. The boy had grown up from an infant of only a few days old and had from the start formed an attachment to his privates. Now I am far from a prude but, I told him I realised it was his son and he was still young but, he should start trying to break the boy from this habbit because it could be viewed by some as possible child abuse. The man laughed and said he really did not see a problem with it at this time, as it keep his son quite and occupied. I simply finished the conversation and said see you around without further comment. OK, so my question is what do you all think of this situation?

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    • #3
      I think it should have been stopped long before the child got to 4 years old.

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      • #4
        Analysis;
        A four year old child hanging on to his father's penis while walking on the shifting sand on a beach would cause the father to have an erection (from the jiggleing) and/or cause pain to his groin area.

        This gross sight would not be considered "cute" as you state that you think it was, but would cause disapproval and scorn by most beach-goers.

        These sights sound unreal and gross!

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        • #5
          Agreed, that shouldn't continue.

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          • #6
            Suppose a 4 year old boy was walking on the beach and constantly holding on to his own penis, how would this be viewed?

            Most would tell you that it is a possible sign of the boy being sexually abused.

            If this is the case, this is more suspicious if he is holding onto an adult man's penis.

            If you see them again, I would write down any license tag number and call the authorities.

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            • #7
              I only noticed this family on the beach the first day. The father did not appear to be erect. I only thought it to be cute from the stand point of first observation. Here is this man with arms and hands loaded down and a child seeming to want to try to hold his hand or something until they got where they were going. It wasn't until the next day that flags went up for me. I didn't pay much attention to them the rest of the first day except to see them in the water a few times. I thought it strange when I saw them the next day shopping and it was obvious that the child was still hanging on. That is why I ask him about it. In a foreign country with people from all over the world how and who would you try to report it to. I would have been at a disadvantage because I didn't even know his name.

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              • #8
                I did not say what you should have done. I placed the advice in the future.

                However, if a four year old boy holds onto an adult man's penis, this is wrong even if the penis is not erect.

                An adult walking man has a different gate than a four year old boy. This is true simply because the man has longer legs.

                A man's penis is in front of his legs. It would be very difficult for a four year old to hold onto the man's penis while they are walking.

                Since this would require an unusual amount of practice it is obvious something wrong has been going on.

                This is evidence of sexual abuse. If you should see something like it in the future, you should call the authorities.

                I agree that nudity is not wrong. If a nudist family wants to be nude, that is not abusive. This means that I expect adult men, with or without erections, adult women, teen boys, with or without erections, teen girls, young boy, and young girls to be able to be nude in front of each other.

                However, if children are preoccupied with their own genitals, this is of concern. If they are preoccupied with an adult's then something is wrong.

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                • #9
                  quote:
                  Suppose a 4 year old boy was walking on the beach and constantly holding on to his own penis, how would this be viewed?

                  Most would tell you that it is a possible sign of the boy being sexually abused.

                  I do not think that if a boy constantly holds onto his own penis it is a sign of sexual abuse.
                  It is a sign that the boy who holds onto his own penis feels a pleasurable, comforting sensation.

                  Many times a parent must remind a boy to let go of his own penis in his pants, especially when he is out in public - but has nothing to do with sexual abuse.

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                  • #10
                    David77

                    I said "Most would tell you that it is a possible sign of the boy being sexually abused". That is different from saying that it is a definite sign of abuse.

                    While four year old boys may touch their penises in public settings, this is different from focusing on it.

                    However, if the boy is holding onto an adult man's penis, this is red flag warning sign.

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                    • #11
                      walter05 - I agree with you and even if there was no abuse involved the father should realize the harm he is doing his son at least in the eyes of others.

                      On a lighter note I keep visualizing the young lad having a good grip and then stumbling.

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                      • #12
                        I agree with others here that it is highly unusual and the father should have never allowed it to even begin. I am going with the man's explanation that his penis is acting as a kind of security blanket for his son.

                        All security blankets should be weaned, and the earlier the better. No secuirty blanket should ever be a part of another person. This boy has serious attachment issues if he is still using his father to calm down. They are not teaching him self-control by allowing this to continue. The parents need to stop allowing him to use his father and cut him off (the boy, not the father ) in a manner of days.

                        walter:"This is evidence of sexual abuse."

                        Without any other evidence, I would have to disagree. If he were intentionally "playing" with his father, then I would agree. But his use of the penis as a grip or a calmer, while unbelievably unusual, does not evince abuse. However, if someone were to call the police on him, he would be very hard pressed to explain it to a judge.

                        Bob S.

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                        • #13
                          I would have to agree Just because the child uses the man's penis as a security blanket does not exactly mean it is abusive. I do believe this "habit" needs to be Broken ASAP. But not abusive.

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                          • #14
                            evidence is not the same as conclusive evidence. The problem is that none of us are trained to make the determination. It is evidence and trained specialists should evaluate the situation.

                            "Just because the child uses the man's penis as a security blanket does not exactly mean it is abusive." Please read this statement by "Christy and Kevin" again. It certainly is indicative of a problem.

                            I have six children including two boys. There is a difference between enjoying the sensation and playing with their penises and being focused on them. As Bob said, most parents provide some caution for the boy so he will not do this in public settings. At some point both boys became fascinated by their penises. However, the phase did not last long and their interest was not constant.

                            As a society, we have tended to turn our backs on abuse of children. This has been particularly true in the case of sexual abuse. We should be aware of the possibility and make a referral to trained professionals who will be able to make a better determination.

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                            • #15
                              Definitely a 'red flag' event. I can't imagine the causes, but the effects could be long-term and detrimental to the child's 'adjustments/impressions'. Not sure how to put the thought into words, so please follow my drift, if not my actual wording.

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