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Family Nudism - Your Take

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  • #31
    Re: Family Nudism - Your Take

    Originally posted by Agde View Post
    Sounds like a lot of "adult angst" going on. If parents are self-consciously double-thinking everything, rather than being just naturally easy-going naturists, the kids are definitely going to feel unsettled. Such a shame at a stage when they're so sensitive to stable role models and interpersonal values that make sense... I don't understand how isolating family naturism by time or place sends any of the right messages.
    I agree with that. I'm one of those who says that the kids are not in charge of the family and don't get to make the rules - you can give their wishes all due regard without putting them in charge - so it is the parents' prerogative to establish a household where nudity is permitted. Young children will adjust to household nudity very quickly, adolescents are likely to resist or ignore it (and no one is talking about forcing them to be nude if they don't want to be) but even they are likely to ultimately benefit from living in an environment where nudity has lost its power to shock or be prurient.

    But because of their exes Nudkin & spouse are not in a position to suddenly become a nudist household without risking custody/visitation of their children. While I am firm in saying children are not in charge of the household, the children are far more important than making your home a nudist haven.

    In 5 years (or less) it will no longer be an issue. That may seem forever, but believe me, it will pass in a blink.

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    • #32
      Re: Family Nudism - Your Take

      Originally posted by Naturist Mark View Post

      But because of their exes Nudkin & spouse are not in a position to suddenly become a nudist household without risking custody/visitation of their children. While I am firm in saying children are not in charge of the household, the children are far more important than making your home a nudist haven.

      In 5 years (or less) it will no longer be an issue. That may seem forever, but believe me, it will pass in a blink.
      As a side note here, it might be significant for all chiming in to know that my ex-wife used my interest in naturism as a primary excuse to file for divorce. She had mega image problems to the point that we were never nude in front of each other except in the most intimate times...not much then either unfortunately. In my case, the phrase "addition through subtraction" is a definite truth where I am much better off without her. And in 5 years, my daughter (the youngest of our kids) graduates HS so all efforts to mask ourselves will take on a different posture.

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      • #33
        Re: Family Nudism - Your Take

        Originally posted by nudkin View Post
        ...my ex-wife used my interest in naturism as a primary excuse to file for divorce...
        I do understand the predicament, and I guess the only practical option is to continue to preach the positive values of family naturism while noting out loud that you realize there are external considerations that make what should be no big deal into a big deal. Until the girls were willing on their own to testify in a custody court that family nudity is no big deal to them at all and that it has in fact taught them wonderful interpersonal values, it sounds like suspending naturist family life for a few years is what you're left with. Paraphrasing Sondheim,

        In a world where the kings are the judges,
        Where intolerance prevails
        And liberty fails
        ...
        In a world where the princes are lawyers,
        What can anyone expect
        Except to genuflect
        ...

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        • #34
          I started sleeping nude at age 10 and became a home nudist while in college.I continued the practice at home when I graduated. I began dating my future wife and let her know early on about my desire to be nude at home. She had no objections and I continued the practice when we married. When the 4 kids came, there was no reason for me to start covering up at home, because I had always been nude at home. My wife even agreed to go to Cypress Cove Nudist Resort with the kids and they all actually liked it.
          Now that the kids are in their late teens and 20's, I am the only one that never wears clothes at home. It is a shame that the kids have not taken up the lifestyle, but it is their choice, not something that was forced on them. As they get older and start families of their own, home nudity will not be foreign to them and they may even pick up the practice in the future.

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          • #35
            I wish I had grown up in a nude environment more than what I had. It was as I was becoming a teenager that my interest in nudity went into high gear. My dream was to own an island so I could live naked. It was a time when I did not care what others thought, did not have a lot of friends, and those I did have were not that close. I chose to stay home with my family on Friday nights when the others were at sporting events. That said, we were casual about nudity in our house. It was just Mom, Dad, and five male siblings. We had three bedrooms and one bath to share and we did, sometimes with as many as five of us in the bathroom at the same time. But, it was not a nudist lifestyle.
            I was introduced to nude swimming in my college PE class and took it to the nearby lake with my girlfriend. We often stayed nude for a while after getting out of the water. When we married, I suppressed my desires for nudity and did not do much nude until I became single again. As i look back, I now wish that I could have called myself a nudist fifty years ago, had my wife join me, and raised my kids so nude was normal.
            I still spend more time clothed than nude but there are days when I do not get dressed and my current wife only objects when the grandsons are here. However, since we do share the hot tub nude, the kids are exposed to me being naked in the house and they don't seem to care. The last time we were getting out of the tub, I told them that they could get dressed, put on their pajamas, or run around naked. They chose to wrap themselves in towels and watch TV. So at five and nearly eight, they are already in the naked is wrong mode.

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            • #36
              I have a family in which I alone probably fit the criteria of a nudist. But, it is safe to say that we have a nudist lifestyle. Since everyone calmly perceives my way of life. I can't demand anything, and I won't. I'm outnumbered. And I have, of course, rules that I must follow. At the expense of the need to insist on something. It's not productive. If there is respect for a loved one, mutual love and understanding, why go into the sphere of dictate in a relationship? I certainly would. to feel like a complete nudist family, but also to make a fetish out of it, I think it is inappropriate. I'm comfortable, I'm comfortable with you. What else do you need?

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              • #37
                Maybe my wife would say something about family nudity. We don't have kids yet, but I know we will be exposing them to living nude at home.

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                • #38
                  If they are young, kids can view family nudity as natural and matter-of-fact. As they get into adolescence it can become awkward, especially for females, who may drop out for a few years until returning to the lifestyle as adults and to the relaxed attitude they grew up with.

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                  • #39
                    Originally posted by EltonJ View Post
                    Maybe my wife would say something about family nudity. We don't have kids yet, but I know we will be exposing them to living nude at home.
                    I think it's pretty important for the mother to be more than just tolerant; although not necessarily a full participant.
                    I was already a home-nudist when my daughter was born; my wife was not (as previously mentioned) but was "tolerant" of it. So for a time I was the only one nude at home. As my daughter got older, I started feeling that my nudity - and her Mom's absence of it - was creating an "imbalance." My daughter, although very young at the time, seemed to take note of the fact that Mom and Dad were "different." I felt that it would send her mixed signals about nudity. I discussed it with my wife, who basically shrugged it off. She just wouldn't be naked at home around her daughter; and I certainly couldn't force her.
                    Luckily, I managed to introduce my wife to social nudism at the resort. There, she saw families being nude around each other. And it "struck a nerve" in the positive sense. I conveyed - in practice - what I had been trying to tell her.

                    And so my wife became more encouraging rather than just tolerant. She started asking our daughter if she wanted to get dressed after bathing; rather than just putting clothes on her automatically. Telling her it was ok if she wanted to stay naked "like Daddy." Taking a positive stance about it. That meant a lot.

                    Nudity then became more frequent around the house as our daughter opted more and more to just stay nude. My wife eventually realized that she was now the only person remaining fully clothed in the house. It came to her, one day, that if we were going to be a "nudity-positive" family, she should also demonstrate those values herself, for our daughter, as a female. So one day she came home, showered, and walked into the living room naked. I know it took a lot for her to take that step; but it worked. It totally changed the dynamic of nudity in our home. My daughter now had both parents being nude with her; which instilled a sense of normalcy with nudity.

                    The moral of this story is simply that I couldn't have done it without my wife's support. It's much harder without it.



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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by NudonyII View Post

                      I think it's pretty important for the mother to be more than just tolerant; although not necessarily a full participant.
                      I was already a home-nudist when my daughter was born; my wife was not (as previously mentioned) but was "tolerant" of it. So for a time I was the only one nude at home. As my daughter got older, I started feeling that my nudity - and her Mom's absence of it - was creating an "imbalance." My daughter, although very young at the time, seemed to take note of the fact that Mom and Dad were "different." I felt that it would send her mixed signals about nudity. I discussed it with my wife, who basically shrugged it off. She just wouldn't be naked at home around her daughter; and I certainly couldn't force her.
                      Luckily, I managed to introduce my wife to social nudism at the resort. There, she saw families being nude around each other. And it "struck a nerve" in the positive sense. I conveyed - in practice - what I had been trying to tell her.

                      And so my wife became more encouraging rather than just tolerant. She started asking our daughter if she wanted to get dressed after bathing; rather than just putting clothes on her automatically. Telling her it was ok if she wanted to stay naked "like Daddy." Taking a positive stance about it. That meant a lot.

                      Nudity then became more frequent around the house as our daughter opted more and more to just stay nude. My wife eventually realized that she was now the only person remaining fully clothed in the house. It came to her, one day, that if we were going to be a "nudity-positive" family, she should also demonstrate those values herself, for our daughter, as a female. So one day she came home, showered, and walked into the living room naked. I know it took a lot for her to take that step; but it worked. It totally changed the dynamic of nudity in our home. My daughter now had both parents being nude with her; which instilled a sense of normalcy with nudity.

                      The moral of this story is simply that I couldn't have done it without my wife's support. It's much harder without it.


                      a positive point of view. I enjoyed it. If you look from the daughter's side. I didn't grow up in a nudist family, but I wanted to, and I became a nudist. And my parents helped me to some extent in this.

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                      • #41
                        My experience is my kids quit it at about 12 or 13, then returning to it on a very limited basis after about 20. Grandkids are in the midst of the “no way” years.

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                        • #42
                          My wife and I met when her son was 14, but she visited resorts with him since he was 9. A couple of years after we married, we adopted a 6 year old boy. Before he came to live with us, his caseworker called and told us he had serious body issues, and that we should consider making nudity very open and casual for our son's benefit. We almost told the caseworker we were nudists, but didn't quite. We did tell him we were taking his advice and that after some initial resistance to bathing, our son was doing much better in that regard. Fact was, he ended up being nude whenever possible once he got over the initial hurdle that naked was ok.
                          it was awkward talking to friends' parents, but when we did, we found that in our son's case, they really didn't mind nudity (including THEIR son's)

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                          • #43
                            My story is this: I was raised as a young boy into a clothes non free church going home, when my parents got divorced when i was around the age of 5, my dad, soon after that got remarried to this lady who wound up becoming my stepmother. Fast forward to a few years later, she would eventually see us (my brother and I) naked a few times as kids. it was wonderful, she let us just be boys.

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                            • #44
                              I have a couple of step grandsons who I would love to let be boys. Grandma is more inhibited, even makes them wrap in a towel when getting out of the bathtub.

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                              • #45
                                My take on family nudism, it's entirely up to the family. It's better to start off young, but some of us started late in life and suffered "hang-ups" about being nude around the house. I believe there are more familys that embrace nudity in the house, that don't call themselves nudists, that we are left to believe.. They are comfortable around household family members at times, i.e., casually relaxing in the evenings (unwind), choosing not to dress after an evening shower or even eating dinner unclothed. But they will not be comfortable being nude around other family members who do not live within the household, or non-family members. Case in point, I am the only nudist in our house. I embrace nudity almost constantly, but if I wear anything when it's just our household, it's just my skimpy wrap-around, which with the split side, it's clearly evident there is nothing on underneath. If we have company during the summer, I'll don on shorts, but wear the light weight shorts, which if the light is just right, it's easy to tell there is nothing on underneath as well. Sure, if we have a family gathering, I will wear shorts that are more appropriate for the "outside world".

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