Gawkers -- a problem?

[Gary Naturist]

From time to time, the subject of gawkers comes up -- e.g. in connection with clothing-optional beaches.

I'm near one extreme on the comfort-with-nudity scale -- totally comfortable being nude in any situation (even if the only one nude) except where others are offended.

I view gawkers as being at the other end of the scale -- very uncomfortable with nudity. Might be because of body acceptance issues, or because of connecting nudity with sex.

In most cases, I think that gawking is beneficial to the gawker. Satisfies curiosity, demystifies nudity, desensitizes the person, etc.

I'm meeting my needs (freedom, relaxation) by being nude, and I don't mind if others satisfy their needs by seeing me nude.

A major qualification: I'm male and able to take care of myself. I'm definitely not in favor of situations where gawkers make gawkees (expecially women and children) uncomfortable by aggressive or persistent actions.

Question: Do you agree or disagree with my views, and why?

Gary

[Gary Naturist]

From time to time, the subject of gawkers comes up -- e.g. in connection with clothing-optional beaches.

I'm near one extreme on the comfort-with-nudity scale -- totally comfortable being nude in any situation (even if the only one nude) except where others are offended.

I view gawkers as being at the other end of the scale -- very uncomfortable with nudity. Might be because of body acceptance issues, or because of connecting nudity with sex.

In most cases, I think that gawking is beneficial to the gawker. Satisfies curiosity, demystifies nudity, desensitizes the person, etc.

I'm meeting my needs (freedom, relaxation) by being nude, and I don't mind if others satisfy their needs by seeing me nude.

A major qualification: I'm male and able to take care of myself. I'm definitely not in favor of situations where gawkers make gawkees (expecially women and children) uncomfortable by aggressive or persistent actions.

Question: Do you agree or disagree with my views, and why?

Gary

[Rik]

Gary

There's no doubt that people are attracted to the naked body - probably because seeing others naked is still not an everyday experience, even for many naturists. So it's likely that people will look when they see nudity. On the one hand some will simply look and have their curiosity satisfied and at the other extreme you'll get those who look to satisy their sexual needs. To many people they are all just "gawpers" (or "gawkers") and many naturists seem to object to anyone looking at them - whatever their motives.

My view is that if you're prepared to go naked in public then you should expect people to look. Indeed perhaps naturists should openly encourage this as it would help to break down the barriers which exist between nudists and non-nudists.

When gawping becomes intrusive (whether to females or males) to the point where it might be considered sexual harrassment, then perhaps it's time to call the cops just as you would do in any other situation.

So yes, I think I agree with you.

Rik

[Naked Bob 2]

I have no problem with someone seeing my naked body. I also believe that if you go to a nude beach you should expect to be looked at, to a degree. However there are those out there who seem to go beyond what I would feel comfortable with.

They target women primarily, at least the ones I have noticed. Let me give some examples. They will usually move extremely close to some woman and position themselves so they can get the best view. They stare direclty at the person for an extended period. Then after a bit they move on down the beach to the next person to attract their attention. These guys can be nude or fully clothed or anywhere in between. Some of them will even try to masturbate if they feel they can get away with it.

I'm a real live and let live kind of guy. Different strokes for different folks and all that. But at some point this behavior becomes harrassment and is detremental to our cause. I realize we all have varying degrees of comfort with nudity. But I think we can agree that this is not what we are all about.

My main problem with this is that these women have to over come so many hurdles just to get out and try this. Body image problems,societies view of them, being way to critical of every imagined flaw. Then here come these creeps that just reinforce all the negative stereotypes that are out there. No wonder it is hard to get a woman interested in trying this sort of thing.

Just my opinion, I could be wrong, but thats how I see it.

[Gary Naturist]

Bob 2: I hadn't thought about the presence of gawkers discouraging women from coming out to a clothing-optional beach in the first place. Clearly a situation that we want to avoid.

Gary

[Nude in the North]

Personally I think all Gawkers are Perverts. They may be at different levels of perversion, but they certainly are Perverted.
Whether they hang around the edges of a nude beach, or sit in the middle. They are just trying to get enough visual input to feed their fantasies. Sooner or later they will act out on those fantasies and someone will be harmed.
I'm not going to try to analize the reasons for their perversions. But anyone on a nude beach should be wary of them. Just as you would be wary of any person hanging around a grade school playground.

Sorry for the strong feelings on this one.
It's Personal.

Steve

[sw1sweendog]

I also agree that if your gonna be nude in public,people will take a glance or two.In my situation it was gaygawkers,nice beach but a gay one for the most part.I have no problems with gay people.but they will walk up to within 2-3 feet away and stare at my package!!so i just tell them to take a picture and go away!!

[Bob S.]

Gary, you stated,
"In most cases, I think that gawking is beneficial to the gawker. Satisfies curiosity, demystifies nudity, desensitizes the person, etc."

Are you insinuating that gawkers are becoming more nudist-friendly because of their gawking? If so, I must respectfully disagree. When someone gawks, they are doing so to satisfy their sexual urge and will carry the image with them well after they leave the area. They will probably also use the memories for sexual self-gratification.

There is a difference between gawking, staring, and just plain noticing. Gawking is a sexually-based action, staring is just plain rude and could be a precursor to gawking, and just noticing that someone else is naked is how most nudists behave.

Gawking, by my definition, causes the victim to be uncomfortable. It is at the extreme end and can be viewed as sexual harrassment. I have, in fact, been the victim of such a person, albeit a more extreme version.

While at a nudist park, this man came up to me, which isn't very unusual as nudists are pretty friendly. What was different for me was that I had this ""creepy" feeling that I had never felt before in the presence of someone else. I just put it off and went on with my day. He showed up next to me again while I was relaxing by the pool. I could tell that he was eyeing my penis, but wasn't interested in being too confrontational at the time. And plus, there were plenty of people around so I felt safe.

He found me again a couple hours later when I was relaxing in the TV room after coming out of the hot-tub. This is when he started to talk and basically hit on me. I told him explicitly that I was not interested. He left, but found me once more when I was in the library. This time, he crossed the line between normal gawker and stalking pervert. He actually asked me if he could touch me (at least he asked)! I quickly got out of there after saying NO! That was when I reported him.

What that story is saying is that you know when someone is gawking you. There is no doubting that uncomfortable feeling that accompanies a gawker. They are probably only a few steps away from a violent sexual predator.

Bob S.

[FireProf]

Gotta agree with nakedBob2 on this one.

Took me along time to get my wife to agree with nudism. When I did, I scoped out the nude beach closest to us by myself. Met some nice people, saw alot of gawkers. Just like Bob2, these people (usually guys) position themselves so they can look for long periods right between womens legs.

We can't just go to our favorite beach and lay out our blanket. We gotta scope out the area and usually huddle together with other couples. If any space is left between couples, some gawker will come along and sit right between us and stare all day long. Then our friends and I usually spend the day chasing off gawkers instead of relaxing and enjoying the day.

This has a negative effect on women and especially my wife. We love the beach but have started to visit resorts more frequently because there is alot less likelyhood of encountering gawkers.

There is definately a difference between the gawker nakedbob2 and I have encountered and the guy who is really serious about being a true nudist. You can pick them out. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif[/img]

[Gary Naturist]

Bob S: Thanks for your comments. You have defined gawking as always having a sexual component. I looked up "gawk" at dictionary.com, which gave the defintion "to stare or gape stupidly". That's the definition that I had in mind.

One example of gawking that is relatively inoffensive occurs sometimes at Club Orient. On occasion when a cruise ship arrives, some of the passengers head straight for the beach at Club Orient and gawk at the guests who are sunbathing nude. Seeing nude people is clearly a novelty for them -- a cheap shore excursion, I guess.

I have described gawking at one extreme (relatively inoffensive) and you have descibed gawking at the other extreme (very offensive).

Gary

[She_Potion]

To All,

I wanted to add my two bits to this subject,
Gawking also occurs at the Nudist Resorts and some of the worst offenders are some of the members who actually there most of the time. So for those thinking they can get away from the gawker crowds at the resorts...think again...for some that is one of the ways they perceive nudity and acceptance justification of joining [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_confused.gif[/img]

Guess this is cheaper and more legal form of entertainment then the strip joints.

[Rik]

She Potion

From your perspective how would you define the sort of gawking you're talking about? Do you see it, for example, as harrassment and if so how do you deal with it? Or do you see it as the nudist equivalent of what goes on anywhere else i.e. men eyeing up the women which, it has to be said, some women may find flattering?

Rik

[dbickin]

She Potion

I was curious if you reported the behavior to the club management, and if so, what was their response?

David

[Guest]

Sometimes a simple, innocent look can be interpreted as gawking or staring. Let me relate something I told before.

I was a member of Forest Hills Nudist Club. One day I was sitting by the pool and looking at the ground, minding my own business. There was a sudden movement on my left. Just as I looked up, the woman who had flicked a towel which had caught my attention looked at me. She was on her knees with her butt staring me in the face. I quickly looked away.

Later I saw her talking to a man and looking at me. Call me paranoid but I'm sure she was saying something about me staring at her butt. That part of a body does not interest me in the least.

My attention was caught by her flicking the towel, and that was why I looked. She apparently interpreted that as me gawking at her butt.

Yes, people look for various reasons, and not all of those reasons are innocent as mine was. Any normal man enjoys seeing a good looking, well shaped woman, even if he is a nudist--especially since most nudists I've seen, including myself, aren't good looking or well shaped.

Unfortunately, there are those who go to places where people are nude for the express purpose of sight seeing, and maybe getting a few photos if they can. These people are the ones who scare away the women--especially the singles who are afraid to go alone--and cause them not to trust any of the men, especially the men who are alone, or am I wrong as usual?

Gawking or staring at someone makes them very uncomfortable. Unwanted attention is always uncomfortable. I've gotten unwanted attention from other males, and I've been stared at by males. Unfortunately, women never stare at me. I really wouldn't mind some attention from some unattached ladies. I suppose being 56 and past my prime has something to do with that. [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif[/img] [img]/infopop/emoticons/icon_cool.gif[/img]

[Guest]

quote:

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Originally posted by Gary Naturist:
[qb]From time to time, the subject of gawkers comes up -- e.g. in connection with clothing-optional beaches.

I'm near one extreme on the comfort-with-nudity scale -- totally comfortable being nude in any situation (even if the only one nude) except where others are offended.

I view gawkers as being at the other end of the scale -- very uncomfortable with nudity. Might be because of body acceptance issues, or because of connecting nudity with sex.

In most cases, I think that gawking is beneficial to the gawker. Satisfies curiosity, demystifies nudity, desensitizes the person, etc.

I'm meeting my needs (freedom, relaxation) by being nude, and I don't mind if others satisfy their needs by seeing me nude.

A major qualification: I'm male and able to take care of myself. I'm definitely not in favor of situations where gawkers make gawkees (expecially women and children) uncomfortable by aggressive or persistent actions.

Question: Do you agree or disagree with my views, and why?

Gary[/qb]

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I know more than one nudist that started out as merely a curious gawker at a beach. Don't ever assume you know why any one person is there.