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So...how do YOU respond to "newbies"?

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  • So...how do YOU respond to "newbies"?

    Ok...so I am responding to the call for more posts...

    This post is a little more geared to people who have social nudity experience. At some point or another most of us have shared our personal nudist space with a "newbie." Undoubtedly, "newbies" come in great variety. From the often discussed reluctant S/O who is there because their partner convinced them to try out social nudity, to the visitor who has never experienced social nudity but decided to pay a visit with a friend or visit a nudist friend, to the person who is looking for a transformative experience...there are many reasons for "newbies" showing up at your favorite nudist venue. Some go nude right away or eventually while others opt to stay dressed on their first visit; some socialize and mingle while others stay to themselves and observe quietly.
    And the surrounding nudists will react differently to the "newbie."

    My GF, at Club O. earlier this year, was the "newbie." Although she did soon go topless, her shyness was quite apparent to others. We were surrounded by several nudists, who reacted differently to her presence. One gentleman started talking to us, and a bit obtrusively - but humorously, tried to talk my GF out of her shyness and that last piece of garment (her bikini bottom) that was preventing her from "officially being a nudist." One lady sitting next to us ignored her completely. One couple chatted with us in "everyday life" conversation, not bringing up nudity or nudism; which I think my GF enjoyed best. Different nudists relating to my GF in completely different manners. When my GF finally did go nude some of our neighbors applauded her, while others paid little heed to her clothesfreedom.

    At nudist venues I've seen people also react very differently to "newbies." I've seen them being shunned for choosing to remain dressed; while others were encouraged to be nude. Reactions to a "newbie" joining in and getting nude, on the other hand, has often been met with approval, or even applause from the more experienced nudists.

    So my question is...how do YOU react to "newbies"? Avoidance, approach, introduction? And how did the "newbie" react to it?

  • #2
    I/We take the "we don't care if you're naked or not. We will talk with you about lots of other things and really won't bring up the fact that you're not naked or you're just topless and give you the space to make up your own mind when you're comfortable enough to get naked" approach! hahahahaha Most times, if it's a female hesitant or reluctant at a beach or resort, my wife will talk with them and they seem very at ease with asking another woman questions and feel they'll get straight answers.


    ​I think those guys that begin teasing and joking with a reluctant or hesitant female can cause a reverse effect and the reluctant may decide ... "forget it, this is not for me." We'll take the approach and introduction reaction and treat them as we would any newbie, regardless if they are naked, topless or fully clothed. We certainly would never avoid newbies.

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    • #3
      Everyone has their own speed and comfort level at going completely nude their first time and no amount of convincing or talking about the subject is going to make them want to get into it any faster. I treat newbies as people, period. Whether they are completely dressed or half-dressed or whatever, I've always just talked to them and acted around them as I would if they were full nudists. It's not that I'm thinking "If we ignore the elephant in the room they'll see that we're all nice people and eventually go nude."

      And just because someone is clothed does not necessarily mean they are a newbie. I hardly give it a second thought. They could be nudist and had too much time in the sun, or they're cold. The woman could be on her period. The new person could actually be completely ready to go nude but just wants to check out the place and the people first before going fully nude. There's all kinds of reasons for newbies (or anyone) to be clothed in a nudist environment so just treat them the same as everyone else and make them feel part of the group.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by NudonyII View Post
        Ok...so I am responding to the call for more posts...

        This post is a little more geared to people who have social nudity experience. At some point or another most of us have shared our personal nudist space with a "newbie." Undoubtedly, "newbies" come in great variety. From the often discussed reluctant S/O who is there because their partner convinced them to try out social nudity, to the visitor who has never experienced social nudity but decided to pay a visit with a friend or visit a nudist friend, to the person who is looking for a transformative experience...there are many reasons for "newbies" showing up at your favorite nudist venue. Some go nude right away or eventually while others opt to stay dressed on their first visit; some socialize and mingle while others stay to themselves and observe quietly.
        And the surrounding nudists will react differently to the "newbie."

        My GF, at Club O. earlier this year, was the "newbie." Although she did soon go topless, her shyness was quite apparent to others. We were surrounded by several nudists, who reacted differently to her presence. One gentleman started talking to us, and a bit obtrusively - but humorously, tried to talk my GF out of her shyness and that last piece of garment (her bikini bottom) that was preventing her from "officially being a nudist." One lady sitting next to us ignored her completely. One couple chatted with us in "everyday life" conversation, not bringing up nudity or nudism; which I think my GF enjoyed best. Different nudists relating to my GF in completely different manners. When my GF finally did go nude some of our neighbors applauded her, while others paid little heed to her clothesfreedom.

        At nudist venues I've seen people also react very differently to "newbies." I've seen them being shunned for choosing to remain dressed; while others were encouraged to be nude. Reactions to a "newbie" joining in and getting nude, on the other hand, has often been met with approval, or even applause from the more experienced nudists.

        So my question is...how do YOU react to "newbies"? Avoidance, approach, introduction? And how did the "newbie" react to it?
        i think that just having normal conversations and acting casual goes a long way, no matter the environment. i think that a person just wants to feel comfortable. i've seen nervous or casual types at the beach and my wife and i will just say hi or offer a drink or a snack to break the ice and then go about our business (which is usually just sitting there). but that's it. no hassle and no lingering in someone's personal space if they are already out of their element. earlier this year we were at a campground with a sauna and most of us were nude. when some friends joined us in swimsuits they made a crack that "oh, i didn't realize the dress code was casual." some joined, some didn't.

        i think that if someone comes to a club or a beach and is curious to try being nude, the best thing is to let them feel comfortable and relaxed and everything will take care of itself. some will find that they dig it, some will determine that they don't. being overbearing is usually the last thing you want to do.

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        • #5
          Well for me it's depended on the "newbie's" behavior and attitude. I admit at times I've steered clear of them; depending on those factors.

          I've seen "newbies", especially at the nude beach, who at least apparently were there "for laughs." Regardless of their state of (un)dress, some were clearly joking about the situation, making fun of other nudists or even sometimes their own nudity/lack thereof. I guess in some cases it can be attributed to nervousness; but I personally have a hard time trying to relate to someone who doesn't take the situation, or my/their nudity, seriously. As far as trying to "educate" them; well it does seem to me like an exercise in futility.

          I'm also cautious with female "newbies", because I don't want to startle them or be obtrusive, especially if they have never been around male nudists. A telltale sign is if I just say "Hi!" and they immediately take a defensive posture, covering/clamming up or looking away. At that point I just smile or make a friendly gesture and leave it at that. But I'm more than willing to engage them again if/when there are ready for it.
          Personal experience has taught me that female "newbies" are often more comfortable with nudist females. If the "newbie" sitting next to me seems more willing to engage in conversation with a clothesfree lady; that doesn't offend me at all. I get that the chances of her getting comfortable with the situation are higher interacting with nudist women first.

          But I've also been in sitiuations where it was clear that the "newbie" was there to experience social nudity and engage with people. In those cases I do not hesitate to introduce myself and make them feel welcome. Myself, I tend to stay away from bringing up nudity or nudism; I simply ask them about themselves, and make simple conversation (the weather, the amenities if we are at the resort, etc...) If they want to ask specific questions about nudism, I welcome their questions and answer the best way I can. I'm pretty used to it.

          There aren't too many situation where I would encourage/challenge a covered or partially covered "newbie" to "just get naked!" I've seen it happen many times; and it has happened to my S/O's - because it always seems that "that guy" is around. I got lucky in both cases because the "challenge" was taken pretty well; but that may not always be the case for everyone. The only times that's happened for me was because the "newbie" brought it up first: considering going nude but having some reservations. At that point I will give some recommendations: like getting in the water first and then disrobing, going for a walk away from the crowd and trying to do it nude; or if it's a female newbie, changing into just a sarong or just wearing a towel first.

          Comment


          • #6
            I have been an active social nudist since about 2004 and my wife since shortly after we met in 2009. While we don't have a "regular" membership, there are places we go more frequently. As such, we are often looked at as "newbies" by more regular guests and meet more true newbies as a result. We have always been made to feel welcome in private clubs, sans one which is very upscale but has a "lifestyle" clientele. There, we were the only ones nude most of the time and no one made any effort to welcome us beyond the person taking money at the front door. As for the others, we are always made to feel welcome even though we are unknowns and do the same for everyone we meet, which is usually newbies as the regulars are more likely to be in a larger group. Now, when we are walking about and see people near their camps or homes, everyone is very welcoming. I have been invited into homes on more than one occasion by men, women, and couples as if I were a lifelong friend. I do believe that nudists as a whole are very open and friendly by nature and welcome anyone up front until they prove themselves unworthy.

            Comment


            • #7
              I believe, as a whole, newbie couples in a nudist setting are treated with respect and understanding. I think regulars are eager to answer questions or address concerns. Unfortunately...all to often, single males may not feel that same courtesy and for that reason,might not share if they are newbies.

              Many nudists at my resort have been nude for a long time and seem deeply committed to the lifestyle. This permits them to share a variety of nude topics with newbies, well beyond the how to acclimate yourself stage and not feel self-conscious. This can be very helpful to dispel misconceptions or misunderstandings.




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