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advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

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  • advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

    I'm currently 21 years old and have loved running around naked for as long as I can remember. Ever since I was prob 7 or 8 I would go skinny dipping in my friends pool and would always hang out naked when our parents were not home. As I got older I never stopped going naked and started going to nude beaches once I got my license and have been going ever since. In fact that's prob one of my favorite places in the world. I have also gone to nudist resorts multiple times. Unfortunately I still live with my parents and can only go naked at home when they are not home but I take advantage of every time I can go naked when they leave. Unfortunately they do not share my love of being naked and are far from being nudists or engaging in nude recreation.
    With this being said I was wondering if I could have peoples advice on if I should tell my parents I'm a nudist or just keep it a secreit until I get older and have my own place. Also if I did tell my parents how would everyone recommend I bring it up and tell them. I appreciate everyones advice

  • #2
    Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

    at the risk of being blasted.....not knowing you or your parents, the only advice I can offer is for you to think long and hard about WHY you want to tell them at this stage in your life? Is it to shock them? get approval? be allowed to run around nude more often? You likely are NOT going to get their approval, and may cause more problems than you solve...... do i think you should NEVER tell them? Nope, once you have your own place, by all means go ahead and let them know, if nothing else to prevent a heart attack if they visit expectantly! (I guarantee they will call first!) Part of not telling them is respect for them, please do not think you should not tell them out of shame!

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    • #3
      Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

      I really can not think of a reason to not tell them, but then again I can not think of a reason to tell them. If it is just a wish to be honest with them by all means just tell them.

      How open minded are they? If you believe that this will cause a rift between you and them, I would consider not telling them if you do not think they could not handle you being a nudist.

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      • #4
        Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

        I agree with bikinigardner. Good advice. There is no need to tell them now without a reason why. But do look for a window of opportunity to talk about nudity in general. For example, if there is a news story about someone steaking, you can say you don't know why people are worried about it. After all, you don't know why a nude body is a big deal.

        This will start a conversation with your parents. Who knows where it will lead.

        But avoid the negative nudity news items. A report of a flasher should be left alone. It is hard to convert that negative vibe into a positive one.

        Good luck.

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        • #5
          Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

          Again, this all depends on you, your parents, and how well you know them. It may be time to start the shift from being their kid to their adult son. Do you have true conversations with them? I would start by asking them about when they were your age. What did they do? what was it like WAAAAY back then? Have fun with it and really get to know them as people. Believe it or not they are people, and probably a lot like you, since they raised you to be who you are. Maybe not the whole nudist thing though. You never know until to ask. It may help to plan ahead. Write down questions that will help start conversations. Think of ways to guide the talks to what you want to know. A few examples might be- Mom, did you and Dad like to go to the beach when you were my age? I've heard the bathing suits were really weird in the... (80s?) did you ever wear one of those? And even- Have you ever gone skinny-dipping? You might learn pretty quick to drop the idea of being nude in their house.

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          • #6
            Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

            I also agree with bikinigardener's advice.

            If you want their approval, or want to "come out" to them as a nudist, that only serves YOU and your feelings. How will that affect them?

            If you hope for "permission" to be nude around the house in their presence, you are the only one who can judge the chances of that happening.

            Wait till you have your own place, and then do as you please.

            In the meantime (if you think it will make them uncomfortable), they have no need to know what you do in private, when alone, or when you go to the beach.

            You have to judge what will be gained (or lost) by telling them.


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            • #7
              Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

              I guess another take is, try being nude more often in your room with the door closed, take your time covering up after a shower or if possible, walk from the bathroom to your room nude. If they happen to "spot" you, then take the opportunity to explain that you love the nude life and see what the response would be. Maybe not nude, but do you or has your Dad ever walk around the house in your underwear? My Dad wouldn't tolerate nudity (that I know of - never crossed that bridge), but he hung around the house in the evening times in only his underwear. If so, then it would be a starting point for conversation. I have been to a lot of older friends homes, and they weren't shy about letting you in their homes while they sit around in their underwear. Again, they weren't nude, but were comfortable talking to you in their house, in "their" attire (underwear). Lots of luck and let us know how things turn out. Invite them to check out this web site should any questions come up.

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              • #8
                Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                Well its to late,they already know,if your running around at 8 or 9 believe me your parents arent dumm ,i would suggest you use you childhod as a reference point,i dont know what beach you go to but blacks beach among others are well known ,an a reference to the beach your going to might perk there interest an inquiry. I would use the naturist term rather than nudist it is softer an less of a culteral impact or reference point.good luck no hurry

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                • #9
                  Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                  I personally don´t see any reason to not tell them. It´s your lifestyle and your view about things, like politics, religion, sexual orientatnion, or choosing a major at college. As long as you dont flaunt your nudity at their home if they don´t aprove, what´s the big deal? If they think you are a "pervert" or something like the sort, have them see this website, or AANR´s, or whatever.
                  I personally don´t know of anybody in my circle of friends and family who doesn´t know I like to hung around naked, sleep naked, swim naked, and get naked ant c-o beaches. I´m 55 now but it´s been like this since I was in my teens.
                  Don´t take it as a ¨Disorder" or something shameful, or a bad thing, or else you are going to transmit that message.
                  Good luck

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                  • #10
                    Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                    wow! i am sure you will get many conflicting replies to your post! my only advice i could give is to wait until you feel they are ready. they are the ones that have to adjust to your announcement. you will be able to feel when the time is right. wait until then as things may change for the better.

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                    • #11
                      Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                      I used to live with my grandmother. Because of her religious upbringing, I knew she wouldn't approve of me being involved in nudism. I chose to not tell her (she still doesn't know), because I knew she would freak out and it would damage our relationship. I also didn't tell her because i figured she might try to use her power advantage against me (I lived at her place, therefore she might try to manipulate that situation somehow). That said, I still think I made the right decision.

                      As for your case, if you know your parents probably aren't going to approve of it, then I would simply not tell them until you get your own place. That way they can't try to use it against you, and you don't have to worry about awkwards looks from time to time or the relatives finding out and making a fiasco out of it. It doesn't make you less of a person for not telling right away; it makes you a smarter one.

                      In a perfect world, all the adults would be understanding and always do right, and so you wouldn't have to hide and talking about it with them would be okay. In the real world, sometimes parents use their children for their own personal gain. This simply means that even children have to make decisions about when it is best to share information with parents and when to obey parents or not. Commands from some parents should be disobeyed. So I would use your best judgement. Nothing wrong with waiting for a better time to tell them. And if you tell them after you have your own place, at least then you have your own place to retreat to if they don't take it well.

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                      • #12
                        Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                        I would agree most with nature-boy and the one above. I would think the presumption is your general behavior is not going to change in front of them, so why not tell them. Unless there is some sorted deep seeded religious thing that they would be against it, is the only kind of reason I could think of. Your 21, old enough to decide what you like and such, so I think old enough to discuss. I liked natureboy’s way of introducing as I think most everyone’s skinny-dipped at one time or another in their life. I posted in another thread, long ago, my story on it. Being a nudist thing was something I hadn’t done in awhile till about 6 years ago, so I just never brought it up. Then after talking to some folks at a nudist place and them mentioning they could never tell anyone they go, including their family, it struck me as plain wrong, so I made a point to tell the folks next time I saw them. They were like whatever. I think my mom sometimes swim in her indoor heated pool naked at times, from what I gather. I just don’t seeing parent disowning children for a proclivity towards nudity. If they do, its really the parents issue. To be able to be honest with who you are with your parents can be a very liberating thing, I think, especially if you feel as strongly about as you seem.

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                        • #13
                          Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                          thank you guys for all the advice so far its defantly helping to hear other peoples opinions. i guess idealy i was hoping that if i told them then i wouldnt have to worry as much about getting caught and always having to hide the fact that i go naked every time they leave. i dont think they would support it at all but i just hate having to hide the fact that i am a nudist like there is something wrong with it. another big concern i have about going naked at home is being seen by my neighbors because i live in a neighborhood. my back yard has a fair amount of privacy so i frequenly go naked in my hot tub and sometimes tan naked in one spot in my back yard that would make it very difficult for my neighbors to see me but theres still a small chance of me being seen. i dont want to upset any of my neighbors and espcially dont want to cause any problems for my parents by me going naked and getting seen by others. therefore i am uncertain if i should stop going naked outside or if everyone thinks that it is ok as long as i continue to proceed with extreme caution when i do go naked

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                          • #14
                            Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                            One of my students, who was 20 and living at home during college, raised the subject by telling her parents that she'd been reading about the health benefits of "air bathing" and wondered if they'd mind if she didn't get dressed for awhile after showering, just to allow the skin to breathe. Seemed to work. Another case, I was chatting with a 20ish guy at our club and the subject of him living with non-naturist parents came up. I asked what they were like and then suggested that he just tell them when he got home about the fun time he'd had swimming and playing tennis (he and another guy had just beaten us in doubles), and then let them ask where. Turned out that his parents of course had a bunch of questions about the people and atmosphere, but in the end were much more easy-going than he'd expected. He moved for a job, so I never heard if he was ever nude around home, but at least the subject was raised in a no-big-deal sort of way.

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                            • #15
                              Re: advice on if and how i should tell my family im a nudist

                              wow! great ideas Agde! Particularly love the airing idea!

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