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  • Details of my first nude swim

    Hi Everyone...

    Well, Saturday night was my first nude swim social.

    The drive up was kind of tough- the entire state of NJ is under construction, or so it seemed. There were so many times that I almost turned around came home because I was really scared. So I promised myself that if I went to the event and was nude I could have cheesesteaks for dinner every night this week if I so desired. Cheesesteaks speak to me. LOL

    I finally arrived at the swim and nerves set in. But I triumphed and walked in the door. The people at the desk were really nice. I told them it was my first time and they were really warm and helpful. They pointed me towards the locker rooms and off I went. A kind young man was behind me as I walked in and we got to talking. Seeing the men?s room door I told him that his locker room was there. A man passing by noted "This is a nudist event- the locker rooms are co-ed." So the guy went into the women?s locker room with me. There were lots of other men there but I didn?t see any women. Go figure.

    The moment of truth had arrived: time to take off my clothes. The guy near me, named Devon, started disrobing like it was the most natural thing in the world. So, with heart beating loudly enough that you probably all heard it, I did likewise. It was soooo weird to be taking off my clothes in front of a guy! I mean, this guy that I had never met was seeing my underwear! But, I did it!

    Well, I was nude. And nervous. But I had to keep going. Devon and I went to the pool together and I hopped in. Now THAT was an experience. I was overwhelmed with some kind of body feeling but I wasn?t sure what in the world it was or even if it was good or bad. I just knew it was incredibly POWERFUL. I can tell you now- after talking with a nudist friend- that it was called sensuality and that it was a very good thing!

    From the pool we hit the hot tub, had some pizza, and talked to some people. I met a few men who were really WEIRD, but I also met 2 young couples who were incredibly nice. During the evening I also got to play some volleyball, which is VERY fun for me though I?m not too good at it.

    There was soooo much that I didn?t expect. First off, I never did forget- even for a minute- that I was nude. Maybe this is just because of my life experiences. Also, I was surprised to see soooo few women there. I mean, I know that there are more male nudists than female, but I was still surprised about the ratio (seemed to be around 10:1 male to female.) This kind of made me uncomfortable. In my ?research? before going I did look at nude pictures of women, just to know what women were supposed to look like and to see if I looked ?right.? But I never thought to look for male pictures, so I didn?t really know what men look like without clothes. That, in and of itself, was an experience. Even had I known what men look like, I think the ratio would have scared me a bit just because of who I am and my experiences with men in the past. Not that I?m saying that there should be mandatory gender-balancing at nudist functions, I?m just saying how I felt, ok?

    The one big positive of the event was a body-image thing. While there and even now I really feel confident in my body- my body is normal and ok. It helped that I?ve lost 17 pounds since August 1, but seeing other nude women helped me to see that my body is actually decent and normal. This was a HUGE breakthrough for me. And I don?t know that there is any other way that I could have come to this realization.

    I had a rough ride home- very tearful and I couldn?t understand why. I still don?t know what?s wrong. It?s been a hard couple of days for me... there are a lot of feelings going on related to the swim and I can?t identify or describe them. I?m hopeful that I?ll be ok again soon.

    So... will I go back? I dunno. I never did get to the point of feeling comfortable, but I the sensations of the pool while nude are pretty powerful and invite me back. Maybe there is a club or something that has fewer people so that I can actually get to know people. I didn?t really get to socialize with a lot of people- many people weren?t interested in talking and I was so nervous that my social skills were lacking. But maybe in an atmosphere with fewer people things would be different.

    Well, thanks for reading this really LONG post. I just wanted to let you all know how it went.

    Melissa

  • #2
    Hi Everyone...

    Well, Saturday night was my first nude swim social.

    The drive up was kind of tough- the entire state of NJ is under construction, or so it seemed. There were so many times that I almost turned around came home because I was really scared. So I promised myself that if I went to the event and was nude I could have cheesesteaks for dinner every night this week if I so desired. Cheesesteaks speak to me. LOL

    I finally arrived at the swim and nerves set in. But I triumphed and walked in the door. The people at the desk were really nice. I told them it was my first time and they were really warm and helpful. They pointed me towards the locker rooms and off I went. A kind young man was behind me as I walked in and we got to talking. Seeing the men?s room door I told him that his locker room was there. A man passing by noted "This is a nudist event- the locker rooms are co-ed." So the guy went into the women?s locker room with me. There were lots of other men there but I didn?t see any women. Go figure.

    The moment of truth had arrived: time to take off my clothes. The guy near me, named Devon, started disrobing like it was the most natural thing in the world. So, with heart beating loudly enough that you probably all heard it, I did likewise. It was soooo weird to be taking off my clothes in front of a guy! I mean, this guy that I had never met was seeing my underwear! But, I did it!

    Well, I was nude. And nervous. But I had to keep going. Devon and I went to the pool together and I hopped in. Now THAT was an experience. I was overwhelmed with some kind of body feeling but I wasn?t sure what in the world it was or even if it was good or bad. I just knew it was incredibly POWERFUL. I can tell you now- after talking with a nudist friend- that it was called sensuality and that it was a very good thing!

    From the pool we hit the hot tub, had some pizza, and talked to some people. I met a few men who were really WEIRD, but I also met 2 young couples who were incredibly nice. During the evening I also got to play some volleyball, which is VERY fun for me though I?m not too good at it.

    There was soooo much that I didn?t expect. First off, I never did forget- even for a minute- that I was nude. Maybe this is just because of my life experiences. Also, I was surprised to see soooo few women there. I mean, I know that there are more male nudists than female, but I was still surprised about the ratio (seemed to be around 10:1 male to female.) This kind of made me uncomfortable. In my ?research? before going I did look at nude pictures of women, just to know what women were supposed to look like and to see if I looked ?right.? But I never thought to look for male pictures, so I didn?t really know what men look like without clothes. That, in and of itself, was an experience. Even had I known what men look like, I think the ratio would have scared me a bit just because of who I am and my experiences with men in the past. Not that I?m saying that there should be mandatory gender-balancing at nudist functions, I?m just saying how I felt, ok?

    The one big positive of the event was a body-image thing. While there and even now I really feel confident in my body- my body is normal and ok. It helped that I?ve lost 17 pounds since August 1, but seeing other nude women helped me to see that my body is actually decent and normal. This was a HUGE breakthrough for me. And I don?t know that there is any other way that I could have come to this realization.

    I had a rough ride home- very tearful and I couldn?t understand why. I still don?t know what?s wrong. It?s been a hard couple of days for me... there are a lot of feelings going on related to the swim and I can?t identify or describe them. I?m hopeful that I?ll be ok again soon.

    So... will I go back? I dunno. I never did get to the point of feeling comfortable, but I the sensations of the pool while nude are pretty powerful and invite me back. Maybe there is a club or something that has fewer people so that I can actually get to know people. I didn?t really get to socialize with a lot of people- many people weren?t interested in talking and I was so nervous that my social skills were lacking. But maybe in an atmosphere with fewer people things would be different.

    Well, thanks for reading this really LONG post. I just wanted to let you all know how it went.

    Melissa

    Comment


    • #3
      Hi Melissa,

      Congratulations on taking that big first step.

      It can be tough when you don't know people in the group, but once you get past your nervousness you'll find that nudists are generally very neighborly -it's easy to strike up new friendships.

      It is unusual in my experience for there to be such a lopsided ratio of men to women. The group you met with sounds atypical. I've found it is usually about 60-40 without 'gender balancing'. Other times nearly equal. The majority of people come as couples, with the balance unaccompanied males. An unaccompanied female is comparatively rare, so I congratulate you. I sincerely hope the gender misbalance didn't put you off too much. If it bothers you, you may want to try another group's swim next time if they aren't too far away.

      Some clubs, both landed and travel, have Women In Nude Recreation programs. One of the purposes of WINR is to introduce women to nude recreation in a supportive environment with other women.

      Welcome!

      -Mark

      Comment


      • #4
        Melissa,

        I congratulate you on finding the courage to try something completely new to you. Life is full of such moments and most of them introduce us to new hobbies, new friends and help us discover things about ourselves that we did not know.

        I have recently described a similar trip I took a couple of years ago from my home in Atlantic City to the Tri State Sun Club's swim social in Paramus, Bergen County New Jersey. Perhaps this was the same club. The time I went, there was fairly good gender balance. There were mostly couples, several of whom had children. The women's locker room was packed with ladies.

        There were a few other differences between our experiences. I went with a friend from work, I am fairly outgoing and sociable and usually manage to make new friends easily, and I had already been a nudist for a few months prior to that visit.

        The drive up was easy. I had spent the whole day in Manhattan having fun, then crossed back into Jersey in time for the swim meet. The drive home was scary. I drove through the Pine Barrens on the way home and the deer along the highway threatened to jump in front of my car at any moment.

        I am perfectly accustomed to being nude in mixed company and I really do tend to forget completely about being nude. I still feel a little funny undressing in front of other people, but once I am nude, I feel better!

        I take showers with ladies all the time and it seems real natural and comfortable at this point in my "nudification".

        I love volleyball and it is a great icebreaker. Only tall people who play it a lot are good. The rest of us just do it for fun! So is the more intimate atmosphere in a sauna or in a hot tub. It was also really nice to have my buddy from work along to talk to.

        Being nude is sensual in a very good nonsexual way, I agree. Your entire body is in complete contact with your environment. We live much of our lives in sensory deprivation and it really does feel weird when we are nude in a stimulating environment, like sensory overload at times.

        Sorry that you met a couple of weirdos that night. I just don't let anyone latch onto me that I don't want to linger with. I just keep mingling and working the crowd until I find that mutual "click".

        It's funny that nudity is so rare in our textile society that people look weird when we see them in their natural state. It takes a little getting used to.

        At nudist venues, I see thin, obese, young, old, male, female, and various ethnicities. We are all God's children. Having goals for fitness is great, but its good that you can accept yourself as is while you continue to sculpt yourself toward your goals.

        I would definitely revisit the nude swim a few times because the mix of the crowd is sure to change. You might enjoy it far more if you bring a friend. (That also helps you fend off guys who can't take a hint and move on).

        Getting used to being nude is a wonderful goal. It takes time, but is worth the ongoing effort to return to being the real you without apology or shame, without boasting or flaunting, just your nude natural self the way God made you.

        By all means seek out smaller groups with less turnover for social nudity and building friendships. Then you might enjoy all the fun activities at the swim socials with fewer "new to nudism" issues and fewer "single gal among the many guys" issues, and fewer "stranger in a strange land" issues.

        I like the way you write, its very open and rich with detail. Good job!

        Comment


        • #5
          I would like to add my congratulations. I think it took a tremendous amount of courage to go ahead and follow through on this. I think if you go again you might want to call around and see if there are any full time nudist resorts in the area. They tend to be better regulated. Even better to have a friend along, either male or female, just to give you a little moral support. Regardless of what most males might tell you I know I would feel very intimidated if I was in your situation and the ratio was reversed. Try to do a little research on the web see if there is a womens group in you r area. I know my club has a group like this. Don't give up on this, there are so many benefits to this lifestyle. Those feelings you had were real. They meant you were enjoying yourself. It also took me a while to be comfortable in my own body, then I realized I am just as normal as anyone. Some of these events tend to attract more men than others. Good luck and let us know how it works out.

          Comment


          • #6
            Melissa, I too would like to say "well done" for facing your fears and attending your first nude swim. Honestly I cannot completely relate to everything you described in your experience - probably due to several differences, including the fact that I am male. I am sorry that you had to endure "weirdos", as I'm often upset when 'perfectly good naturism' is invaded by 'those types'.

            I can certainly relate to your initial fear. In truth, I had a great deal of anxiety about going to a commercial swimming facility, going into a locker room, getting completely undressed, and just leaving that way. In fact, the thought still freaks me out (and my third swim will likely happen next week). But, once I do it and get over it, it really is a wonderful thing to me.

            I can also share with you what I wrote right after my own first swim (which was just this past September) and shared with the local group that sponsored the swim: "I want to extend a HUGE THANKS to everyone who attended the swim for allowing me just to be there with all of you. Like was expressed, and perhaps because this was my first swim of this sort, I went with some definite fear and concern about it. I returned having experienced a wonderful memory of child-like innocence that my spirit truly craves and enjoyed more than I can say."

            Ben.

            Comment


            • #7
              What can I add to the comments? Except to say that you have great courage. It took far more courage for you, who by your own account had had some bad experiences before your "first time," than for me, who had studied the subject for years and whose bad experiences have had nothing to do with my body.

              It is unfortunate that the word "sensual," which should mean "appealing to the senses," has picked up erotic overtones among much of the English-speaking public. I prefer the word "sensuous," which has not acquired such baggage.

              Congratulations!

              Comment


              • #8
                I'm assuming, Melissa, that you were by yourself. Being the only female there, it definitely took a lot of courage to be nude for the first time with men you didn't even know.

                I hope that the lack of women won't discourage you from going again. I saw your name on another nudist Web site. I think it was NetNude.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Congratulations on going for it! All those differing feelings just let you know you are human and you have reached out and tasted some spices of life!

                  You might look into some nudist resorts near you to see if they have any female spa days or something like that. I know Glen Eden in So Cal does. My wife has a couple girl friends and a sister who would like to take my wife with them which seems like a very good way to meet other females interested in naturism. It would also help even out the gender in-balance. Good luck!

                  T.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    in all of the responses i could find only male that even noted he was nervous about going to a nude swim. while i have never had the pleasure of that type of outing i will tell you the first time i went to a nudest park i was very nervous to the point of having very quessy intestions. i am sure you were far more uneasy as a single lady. i had no companion and didn't know a sole there. i usually don't have too much trouble with making friends but most people didn't accept a single male very well.two times to the same park, same experience. one time at a different park and a much better acceptance. if you are uncomfortable undressing in front of strangers as i am, undress in a semi remote area, do not be in a danger, and wait for a few minutes then join the rest. it might help. i know it helps me. and so if you don't give up you will soon forget about being nude and just enjoy the feeling of being nude. it is a great feeling

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      quote:
                      Originally posted by pahjo2:
                      [qb] in all of the responses i could find only male that even noted he was nervous about going to a nude swim. [/qb]
                      Maybe only one admitted being nervous. In my experience every first timer is nervous.

                      -Mark

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        The next NJ swim is Dec 6

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Melissa,
                          As others have stated, it was great and courageous to go it alone the first time. Don't let that fantastic sensation you described be overshadowed by the fact that the others didn't seem to be too out-going. Even though it seems like you have a long trip to get there, if it were me, I'd give it another shot. Next summer, you should give Sandy Hook in NJ a shot. The people are really friendly. Just my two cents.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            With all this "congratulations on being so courageous" stuff it made me wonder if it is simply a lack of courage which prevents most people from trying naturism rather than the "most people don't want to" line that people like Stu take.

                            Rik

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Interesting potential discussion, Rik. To me "don't want to" isn't really a reason. The question immediately comes to my mind "o.k., WHY don't you want to?" (aka go deeper).

                              My personal belief is that most people around me, if they were honest, would say "fear" - mostly fear of the perception of others, or fear of their own weakness as a result of their association of nudity with sex.

                              Comment

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